Episode Transcript
[00:00:05] Speaker A: You are listening to an atomic broadcasting production. So sit back, relax and enjoy the feature presentation. And remember, do your part. Such as like comment rate and don't
[00:00:18] Speaker B: forget to tell a friend to tune
[00:00:20] Speaker C: in for an atomic time.
[00:00:31] Speaker D: Now, where did we leave off?
Ah, yeah.
The rulers of Nithvale, particularly Gromoskolt the Troll, requested the presence of Alward, Neros and Zephyr at their table.
After questioning them thoroughly, Grammaskult announced that they would be participating in another event. A set of three trials to study their behavior, with Zephyr already plunging into the void, indicated the others begrudgingly followed.
[00:01:11] Speaker A: I'm old, Greg. It's going to be in my head the rest of tonight.
[00:01:14] Speaker C: You are so welcome.
[00:01:17] Speaker B: I never got my cookies.
[00:01:19] Speaker C: While they're over here, you want some cookies?
[00:01:22] Speaker A: We got.
We got some of these cookies.
[00:01:25] Speaker C: They're which are pecan shortbread.
[00:01:27] Speaker A: I believe we got some chocolate peanut butter.
Peanut butter.
[00:01:34] Speaker C: There's some lemon cookies. Got some lemon cookies and some Nutter Butters.
[00:01:37] Speaker A: That's a lot of cookies.
[00:01:39] Speaker B: You know, I'm stocking up.
[00:01:40] Speaker A: I'm not judging.
I'm just surprised. You only wanted those.
[00:01:44] Speaker B: I really like peanut butter and chocolate.
[00:01:47] Speaker A: That's fair. A lot of people do.
[00:01:49] Speaker B: Reese's is my favorite.
[00:01:50] Speaker C: It's a classic combination.
[00:01:52] Speaker B: It's like peanut butter and chocolate. Peanut butter and jelly are the two classic peanut butter mixes.
[00:01:59] Speaker A: I don't like peanut butter that much. I used to love it and then I grew out of it, sadly.
[00:02:05] Speaker C: What happens?
[00:02:05] Speaker B: What are you better than us?
[00:02:06] Speaker A: No, not.
[00:02:08] Speaker C: I don't think that's what he was saying at all. Petite.
[00:02:11] Speaker A: I'm mourning the loss of my love of peanut butter. Petite.
[00:02:15] Speaker B: Peanut butter. Petite.
[00:02:17] Speaker A: Another classic combination with peanut butter.
[00:02:20] Speaker B: This is like a buddy cop sitcom.
Speaking of old things, what movie did you watch?
[00:02:28] Speaker A: Oh, great Segue caught me while I had a cookie in my mouth.
[00:02:35] Speaker B: Let's just have the whole conversation with cookies.
[00:02:39] Speaker C: We're all eating anyway.
[00:02:41] Speaker B: This episode comes with a trigger warning. If you can't handle people chewing things, please skip to wherever.
[00:02:47] Speaker C: Featuring Petite's Mouth noises Part four and Jenkins mouth noises.
[00:02:53] Speaker B: That's a guest star.
[00:02:56] Speaker A: The movie was called the Magic Sword.
It was made in like 1965 and it was great.
It had the very beginning. It was gross. It had a dude creeping up on a girl.
But that feels like very 1960s. But he was doing it via magic. It was.
[00:03:14] Speaker C: That sounds weird.
[00:03:15] Speaker A: It was weird. It was weird. It's about this dude named George.
[00:03:19] Speaker C: Such a normal name.
[00:03:21] Speaker A: Everybody else's name is pretty Pretty solid. But George, and he's raised by a witch, and he goes on a magic quest to save a princess who he was creeping on at the beginning because she got kidnapped.
[00:03:35] Speaker C: So is this like a fantasy film?
[00:03:36] Speaker A: It's a fantasy film.
[00:03:37] Speaker C: Okay. I don't know why I imagined someone just in a suit creeping up on
[00:03:43] Speaker A: some rando in a movie called the Magic Sword.
[00:03:45] Speaker C: I know. Well, that's where my brain went. It went noir, not fantasy, you know, that's valid.
[00:03:52] Speaker A: Yeah. The sword does way too much.
[00:03:55] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:03:55] Speaker B: Is it op.
[00:03:57] Speaker A: It is stops all black magic. It opens any door or wall or floor.
It can pull people. It has the strength to move itself.
It's just really. It's a really good sword.
[00:04:09] Speaker B: You know, back in the 60s, they didn't have all the, like, the reuse of things, so they were just like, yeah, let's make it do everything.
[00:04:17] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:04:17] Speaker B: Nowadays it's just like, no, no, no. You've got enough powers. You can just stop.
[00:04:24] Speaker A: It was very, well, like, the effects and everything, I'm presuming for the time were really good.
[00:04:28] Speaker B: Oh, I love watching things about old movie effects.
[00:04:31] Speaker C: The.
[00:04:31] Speaker B: The YouTube channel corridor crew. I'm sure some of you know about it, but they have a VFX artists react, and sometimes they'll go to, like, really old movies and just show how things were done. Is so cool.
[00:04:44] Speaker A: One of my favorite one, they utilized freeze frame a lot to get, like, specific effects to go on. One of my favorite ones was when they freezed frame like a gargoyle and just implanted a human eye on the gargoyle's eye so the eye could just move around and, like, look. It was very fun.
[00:05:00] Speaker C: A few of these, like, special effects makeup stuff reminds me of some episodes of Star Trek.
[00:05:05] Speaker A: That tracks.
[00:05:06] Speaker B: There's one infamous special effects scene from. I don't know which Star Trek it was, but with the head explosion.
[00:05:15] Speaker C: The original series. Was that the original series or the Next Generation?
[00:05:18] Speaker B: I'm just gonna type in TNG het explode.
[00:05:21] Speaker C: It could be the first season.
[00:05:23] Speaker B: Riker blow up. Alien. Yeah, that's Picard and Riker blow up.
[00:05:27] Speaker C: That's the first season. It's an episode called Conspiracy.
[00:05:30] Speaker B: It is an infamous sfx.
So for people listening at home, pull up the video and then you can listen to our commentary at the same time.
[00:05:38] Speaker C: I recently watched this episode. I don't need a reminder.
[00:05:41] Speaker B: There we go. He's gonna blow up.
[00:05:43] Speaker A: Wait, so their phasers were not set to stun?
[00:05:45] Speaker C: No, they were set to kill.
[00:05:47] Speaker A: Oh, my God. Oh, my goodness.
[00:05:48] Speaker C: It was the only way to kill these creatures.
[00:05:50] Speaker A: Why was that infamous? That was actually pretty decent.
[00:05:52] Speaker B: Well, okay, it's because it's.
[00:05:54] Speaker D: They were shooting people moments ago.
[00:05:56] Speaker B: It's a TV show.
I mean, you got things like Indiana Jones where people's face melt off, but.
[00:06:01] Speaker A: Yeah, that's valid. Oh, that's gross.
[00:06:04] Speaker B: This is like predator levels. No, not predator.
[00:06:06] Speaker A: We need to stop talking about things people can't see.
[00:06:09] Speaker B: Well, I mean, this just makes them want to see it more, probably.
[00:06:12] Speaker D: I want you all to imagine scorpion slopes.
[00:06:15] Speaker A: We don't have scorpion in a chest cavity. They can imagine.
[00:06:19] Speaker C: That's pretty accurate.
[00:06:21] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:06:21] Speaker B: Oh, that guy had two heads. Back to the movie.
[00:06:23] Speaker A: Are you just gonna watch the whole movie? Petite?
[00:06:25] Speaker B: Probably. I mean, we're not.
[00:06:27] Speaker C: You actually watching the movie?
[00:06:28] Speaker A: Yeah, it's on over there.
[00:06:29] Speaker D: Wait, which movie?
[00:06:30] Speaker A: The Magic Sword.
[00:06:31] Speaker D: Oh, yeah.
[00:06:33] Speaker B: Right now we're in a dungeon type of thing with a really big candle.
There's a guy with two heads and a lady that kind of looks like Ms. Frizzle.
[00:06:41] Speaker D: Is this anything like Mozart's the Magic Flute?
[00:06:44] Speaker A: I don't know that one.
[00:06:45] Speaker B: The candle went out. I don't know if it was, but that's a chimpanzee.
[00:06:48] Speaker A: The candle is. She's magic. She turned the candle out with her magic.
That's George.
We gotta stop reacting to things people can't see.
[00:06:58] Speaker B: I don't have any.
[00:06:59] Speaker D: I can't see any of this.
[00:07:00] Speaker B: There's no captions or anything, so I don't know what's going on.
[00:07:02] Speaker C: Oh, I've got captions.
[00:07:04] Speaker D: Oh, well, wait, you're watching it, too?
[00:07:06] Speaker B: Yeah, that's a king in the water. I bet he's gonna find out. Greg, that's a lady dancing.
[00:07:10] Speaker C: Oh, is that George?
[00:07:12] Speaker A: Yeah, why?
[00:07:13] Speaker C: He'd be. Ew.
[00:07:14] Speaker A: Yeah. No, he'd be creeping on the king. And then shortly after, he creeps on the lady taking a bath. Yeah, it's creepy.
[00:07:21] Speaker C: She just bathed and you're over there like, no.
[00:07:24] Speaker A: And then later on in the movie.
[00:07:25] Speaker C: I hate it.
[00:07:27] Speaker A: She hasn't heard of him at all, but he's like, I'm gonna go save her. And the person that she does know of is gonna go save her.
[00:07:32] Speaker C: Oh, your hair is magically so dry.
[00:07:35] Speaker B: Is that a werewolf?
[00:07:36] Speaker A: No, it's a troll.
[00:07:37] Speaker C: Oh, my gosh. That was scandalous for the 1960s.
[00:07:41] Speaker A: I was very concerned.
[00:07:42] Speaker C: Oh, my gosh.
[00:07:43] Speaker B: That looks like a templar.
[00:07:45] Speaker A: Yeah, that's where they're on the bog of it.
[00:07:46] Speaker C: Her hair is so dry. And she just got out of a Pond.
[00:07:49] Speaker B: That's like a movie trope.
[00:07:50] Speaker C: Anyway, that makes me so upset.
[00:07:53] Speaker B: Oh, that looks like the guy from Princess Bride.
[00:07:55] Speaker C: Is this, like a magic mirror type?
[00:07:57] Speaker B: That looks like Taylor Lautner?
[00:07:59] Speaker C: Oh, who looks like Taylor?
[00:08:00] Speaker B: I don't know. I clicked off of it. Really?
[00:08:02] Speaker C: Taylor Lautner is ugly.
[00:08:04] Speaker D: I have a proposal for the the group.
I guess we're just watching tv.
[00:08:10] Speaker C: Well, he. He is walking around a tree looking confused.
[00:08:15] Speaker B: That's a dragon.
[00:08:16] Speaker C: Someone's whining.
[00:08:17] Speaker B: That is a freaking two headed dragon.
[00:08:20] Speaker C: I see, like, haunted ghost faces coming at this guy.
[00:08:24] Speaker D: And so the game master's beckoning fell on deaf ears as the players proceeded to just watch a movie on mute for a long time.
A really long, a surprisingly long time.
Help me.
[00:08:47] Speaker C: Okay, I'm done watching the movie.
[00:08:50] Speaker A: If you guys want to borrow it.
[00:08:51] Speaker C: That was awful for you.
[00:08:52] Speaker A: It's not bad. It's not the best.
[00:08:56] Speaker D: You open your eyes in a cylindrical marble chamber in three directions, equidistant. So in thirds, around the room, around you are arches.
[00:09:11] Speaker C: Did you say marble chamber?
[00:09:12] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:09:13] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:09:14] Speaker D: The ceiling of this marble chamber seems to stretch into infinity.
Each of these archways seems to just lead into a bright white light. But over the top of them is a label. Over one, it reads the Trial of Might.
Over another, the Trial of Wit.
And over the third, the Trial of Skill.
[00:09:39] Speaker B: Did any of us actually hit the ground?
[00:09:41] Speaker D: No. You just open your eyes and you're standing here.
All of you. At the same time, Even. Even though you entered the hole at different times.
[00:09:50] Speaker A: Zephyr, we really need to talk about your impulsiveness.
[00:09:52] Speaker B: Wouldn't it have been funny if that would have gotten us out, like, completely?
[00:09:56] Speaker A: Oh, that would have been great.
[00:09:58] Speaker B: That would have been great.
[00:09:59] Speaker A: It didn't.
[00:10:02] Speaker B: I was gonna ask Nero if she's good, but she's eating a cookie. Where did you even find that?
[00:10:08] Speaker D: Abby, is Nero still holding a chair?
[00:10:12] Speaker C: If you believe she is, then she is.
If you believe she's not, then she's not.
[00:10:17] Speaker A: I always believe she's holding a chair.
[00:10:20] Speaker C: Sorry, I had to eat a Nutter Butter.
[00:10:22] Speaker B: Well, obviously I'm gonna go into the trial of wit.
[00:10:27] Speaker C: Maybe we should all go together.
[00:10:29] Speaker A: That's probably a smart idea.
[00:10:30] Speaker B: Where did you get the cookie?
[00:10:32] Speaker C: It was just on the floor.
[00:10:33] Speaker B: I guess the table did recede into the floor.
[00:10:36] Speaker A: Cookies.
[00:10:42] Speaker D: So the three of you, you don't.
The three of you walk forward into the light of the arch that says the Trial of Wit. And as the light grows brighter. And Blighter.
[00:10:54] Speaker C: Blighter.
[00:10:55] Speaker D: Brighter and brighter. Until it almost blinds you. You blink away the light and find yourself standing now in a completely different room. The walls seem to be made out of blocks of jade and the floor is a pit of sand.
At the other side of the room from where you're standing is a massive, like 12 foot tall steel door that seems to have like a metal working sculpture of an ancient knight embedded in the door.
[00:11:28] Speaker B: So two things. One, your transition reminded me of Super Mario 64 when you look at the roof of the main room and the castle. And two, are we in the trial of wit?
[00:11:38] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:11:39] Speaker A: Are we in the sand?
[00:11:40] Speaker D: Yes. You are now in this room. Sand, floor. There is no door behind you.
[00:11:45] Speaker B: But there is in front of us.
[00:11:47] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:11:47] Speaker C: The entire floor is sand.
[00:11:49] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:11:50] Speaker C: Okay.
This is the trial of wit.
[00:11:54] Speaker A: This is where we die.
[00:11:55] Speaker C: I'm gonna start digging in the sand.
[00:11:57] Speaker B: It's gonna be a short dig.
[00:11:58] Speaker C: I just want to see if there's anything under it that I can find.
[00:12:01] Speaker A: Smooth sand.
[00:12:02] Speaker D: So you dig down a few inches and you very shortly come to like a solid just jade floor underneath the sand.
[00:12:10] Speaker C: I'm going to on my hands and knees.
I have a point. I have a plan. I promise on my hands and knees, I'm going to keep like clearing sand and like crawl further into the room.
[00:12:22] Speaker A: Smart.
[00:12:23] Speaker D: While Neros is doing that, what are Alward and Zafir doing?
[00:12:28] Speaker A: My brain shut off.
[00:12:30] Speaker C: It's gone. Nutter Butter, please.
[00:12:32] Speaker A: No.
[00:12:34] Speaker D: Nearest did you find a Nutter Butter in the sand?
[00:12:36] Speaker C: I found another cookie.
[00:12:38] Speaker A: Guys, stop eating ground cookies.
[00:12:40] Speaker C: No, they're delicious.
[00:12:42] Speaker B: Those could be puzzle pieces. We need those.
[00:12:45] Speaker C: And they should not have made them edible. And they should not have made them taste so good.
[00:12:48] Speaker A: That's part of the wit.
[00:12:49] Speaker B: That's good consumables.
[00:12:51] Speaker A: Door fancy. Any info about night on door?
[00:12:57] Speaker D: Make a society check.
[00:12:58] Speaker A: Thank you.
So glad you understood.
[00:13:02] Speaker B: While he is societizing, I am going to cross my legs, sit in the floor, not in that order. And just look bored.
Jaded, if you will.
I had to look it up.
[00:13:17] Speaker D: 31 with a 31 Albert. You recognize the design of this knight in the armor as being from ancient tradition.
I don't know where in Golarion this would be appropriate, but essentially an Arthurian knight and his posture and stance and such is very appropriate to like the knights who would go to prove their honor and be like, I duel anybody who comes to fight me.
[00:13:47] Speaker B: Mmm.
[00:13:48] Speaker A: But this is the chamber of wit.
[00:13:51] Speaker D: Neros, as you're moving further out into the sand, you get about halfway across the room and Suddenly, this booming voice fills the room. Heed, travelers, I am honor bound to watch this passage. Mark thee well. As my honor stands, whatsoever thy do or say, I shall deny thee.
[00:14:14] Speaker C: Can you tell us that again in normal human terms?
[00:14:18] Speaker D: No.
[00:14:20] Speaker A: Can you not tell us that again in normal common?
[00:14:23] Speaker C: That was out of character. Oh,
[00:14:27] Speaker B: I think he said it that way on purpose, because this is us. This sounded a lot like one of us tells lies situation.
[00:14:35] Speaker D: I'll answer your question out of character. No.
[00:14:38] Speaker C: Can you read it again in the not voice so I can understand what you said?
[00:14:42] Speaker D: Heed, travelers, I am honor bound to watch this passage. Mark the well. As my honor stands, whatsoever thou do or say, I shall deny thee.
[00:14:55] Speaker C: Whatever we do, it's gonna say no.
[00:14:56] Speaker A: I have an idea.
I don't know if it'll be good or not.
Okay, can you watch this passage?
[00:15:09] Speaker D: No. And the statue's visor falls down in front of its face.
[00:15:13] Speaker A: Okay. So it's now breaking its honor. And its honor does not stand anymore.
[00:15:18] Speaker B: Can you still hear us?
[00:15:22] Speaker D: No.
[00:15:23] Speaker B: All right. He can still hear us.
Can you keep us here forever?
[00:15:29] Speaker D: No. And the doors open.
[00:15:31] Speaker A: Beautiful.
Oh, do. Do we have to walk backward through it?
[00:15:39] Speaker C: I don't know. Nero stands up from the sand and like, dusts off her knees and just going to pretend that she wasn't just digging a canal in the sand, like into the middle of the night.
[00:15:50] Speaker A: I thought it was a good idea.
[00:15:53] Speaker B: I have a little bit of a
[00:15:54] Speaker A: castle built, but don't say anything else. And then I guess we just walk out the door.
[00:16:01] Speaker D: And as you walk into the light, it almost blinds you again. And you find yourselves back in the marble chamber.
[00:16:07] Speaker C: That was easier than I thought it would be. Good.
[00:16:09] Speaker B: Good job, Z. I'm very surprised that worked.
[00:16:13] Speaker A: I'm not.
[00:16:13] Speaker C: Well, the wittiest person here, Zafir, the one that figured it out.
[00:16:19] Speaker D: Only two arches remain. The trial of might and the trial of skill.
[00:16:24] Speaker A: I'm scared of both of those same.
[00:16:26] Speaker C: Which one do we want to tackle first?
[00:16:28] Speaker A: We really did the easiest one first.
[00:16:30] Speaker C: I know. We should have saved that one for last.
[00:16:32] Speaker B: I think we might try skill first.
[00:16:35] Speaker A: How is he the most?
Yes. Let's go.
[00:16:39] Speaker B: Skill.
[00:16:40] Speaker C: He's quite capable, I think. You forget about that.
[00:16:43] Speaker A: I do. I really do.
[00:16:45] Speaker C: He's one of the most capable people in our entire traveling party.
[00:16:48] Speaker A: I'm so sorry. I forget about that. Zephyr.
[00:16:50] Speaker B: Am I still wet?
[00:16:51] Speaker C: I don't know. Are you?
[00:16:52] Speaker D: No. I think you're dried off by now.
[00:16:57] Speaker A: That's how you made the castle. You used Your wetness.
[00:17:00] Speaker C: Ew.
[00:17:03] Speaker B: Anyway.
[00:17:04] Speaker C: Ew.
[00:17:06] Speaker B: Trial of skill.
[00:17:09] Speaker D: You walk into the bright light of the archway for the trial of skill. It blinds you again. You blink the light out of your eyes and you find yourself standing in what appears to be a courtyard of a massive manor.
In this courtyard, on your left, there is a twisting, winding, barely cultivated and maintained hedge maze. On the left are a series of hazards and traps like swinging balls over a narrow walkway. And directly in front of you is a pathway that splits the difference between this hedge maze and a base near bottomless pit that has three satyrs standing there holding bow and arrows. But their arrows are tipped with how to stribus.
[00:17:55] Speaker B: How to stribus.
[00:17:58] Speaker C: How to stribus.
[00:17:59] Speaker D: Have you seen the Swan Princess?
[00:18:01] Speaker A: No.
[00:18:01] Speaker C: Yes.
Many times.
[00:18:03] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:18:04] Speaker A: A boxing glove.
[00:18:06] Speaker D: It's like a boxing glove. It's an arrow, but the tip of it is like a poofy powdery thing with like a fuchsia colored powder.
[00:18:13] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:18:14] Speaker B: Erasing American Gladiator. Going with wipeout.
[00:18:18] Speaker D: Behind the satyrs at the far side of the room is a large stone circle with like a big like purple colored painting on it.
[00:18:27] Speaker A: What's the painting of?
[00:18:29] Speaker D: Just symbols. Alward, make a society check or nature check. Your choice. But I think I know which one you'll pick.
[00:18:36] Speaker A: Oh, I wonder which one I'll pick.
You did not fail me. I am so grateful.
But now I have to do math.
[00:18:48] Speaker C: It's what you always have to do when you roll a die.
[00:18:51] Speaker A: In this game. It's more math.
I believe I rolled a 40.
[00:18:57] Speaker D: A 40? Yep. Albert, you know exactly what's going on.
You recognize this as a form of tag that's played in the first world.
The first rule of the game, that you may not harm any of the other players. It's basically like a schoolyard game.
There are two teams and you seem to find yourselves on the aggressor's side. The way you win is to breach the castle. Which means all of your players must be standing at the in that circle at the same time. If that happens, you win.
The defenders need to stop you from doing so.
Typically, when you get tagged, you are out.
[00:19:41] Speaker C: What does out mean?
[00:19:43] Speaker B: Well, we can't be harmed.
[00:19:44] Speaker C: So does that mean we die? Or we're just out of the trial?
[00:19:50] Speaker A: Best case scenario, it brings us back to the other room and then we just try again.
[00:19:56] Speaker D: The three satyrs all bow and then cock arrows on their bows. And I'd like you all to roll. Initiative.
[00:20:02] Speaker C: Oh man. Do we need a map?
[00:20:04] Speaker A: Yes, I Shall do the foregoing of my initiative for the magic. Not the magic, but the magic. The time shenaniganery.
[00:20:11] Speaker D: All right, in that case, Alward, what do you get?
[00:20:15] Speaker A: 19 plus 23 since I rolled above what I needed.
[00:20:19] Speaker D: So a 42.
[00:20:21] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:20:21] Speaker D: Zafir?
[00:20:22] Speaker C: 30.
[00:20:23] Speaker D: All right. And Nero's 29. All right. Unsurprisingly, Alward, you're up first.
[00:20:32] Speaker C: So we have to make it all the way over to that circle.
[00:20:37] Speaker A: Mm.
[00:20:38] Speaker C: Okay.
What are you happy?
[00:20:44] Speaker A: I was scrolling through my spell list and one of the spells was not selected. Was like why?
[00:20:50] Speaker C: But are using. Is using spells right now the best thing?
[00:20:54] Speaker A: I'm a spellcaster. That's how I solve problem.
[00:20:57] Speaker C: I know, but we're in.
[00:20:58] Speaker A: The first world hasn't failed me yet.
[00:21:02] Speaker B: I was going to test it out by one time message. I was. I was going to test it out.
[00:21:07] Speaker C: But you can't hurt the other players.
That's part of the rule.
[00:21:12] Speaker A: Oh, but we can tag the other. Wait, no. What were the rule? Did the rules say anything about us tagging them?
[00:21:18] Speaker B: We are the aggressors.
[00:21:19] Speaker D: You can tag? Yes.
[00:21:21] Speaker C: With what? Do we have anything with our hands?
[00:21:26] Speaker D: As you think that question. On either side of you guys appears barrels with just a plethora of weapons. But all of the like blades and implements have all been replaced by the powder spreading implements. Okay, Zafir, there's even a knitting needle with a powdered end.
[00:21:43] Speaker B: Oh, that's definitely coming with me.
[00:21:45] Speaker D: So you can. I'm gonna mark on the map because I forgot to put this on there.
But if you are adjacent to one of these barrels, you can as a single interact action, grab any weapon of your choice.
[00:21:56] Speaker B: Congratulations. Alward, you can't.
[00:22:01] Speaker A: I'm going to use all three actions to prepare a spell.
And the trigger is if they shoot at us.
[00:22:11] Speaker B: Okay, Zafir, I'm going to point at one of the. What are they called?
[00:22:17] Speaker D: Satyrs.
[00:22:18] Speaker B: Satyrs.
And I'm going to cast message.
And I guess I'm just gonna say what's up?
[00:22:30] Speaker D: The satyr. The spell goes off perfectly, no risk of failure. And then the satyr replies via message. Dude, we're totally gonna wreck your team.
[00:22:42] Speaker A: Oh, I love this satyr.
[00:22:45] Speaker B: So spells work. Well, that's good to know. At least that one does. You know, I have never actually cast this in combat, so I don't know,
[00:22:53] Speaker A: it's an action most likely or two.
[00:22:54] Speaker D: Yeah, it's a single action.
[00:22:56] Speaker B: Okay, then I've got two left. Okay, I will use one action to pull out that Knitting needle as you so graciously offered.
[00:23:06] Speaker C: This is like paintball.
[00:23:09] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:23:09] Speaker B: And then I'm going to run over to the hedge maze entrance.
[00:23:14] Speaker D: Okay. So you can get close to the entrance but not quite there.
[00:23:17] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:23:19] Speaker D: And Neros,
[00:23:22] Speaker C: what do I want from. From the weapon barrel?
[00:23:24] Speaker B: Get gun.
[00:23:27] Speaker C: Can I. Is there a paintball gun?
Can I have a paintball gun?
[00:23:31] Speaker D: Sure.
[00:23:32] Speaker A: Pulls out revolver.
[00:23:33] Speaker D: We'll just use. We'll just use hand crossbow rules.
[00:23:36] Speaker C: I have a paintball gun. Guys, I'm so happy Nero's with a gun.
[00:23:42] Speaker A: Oh no.
[00:23:43] Speaker B: Saturday nights at 7 episode title.
[00:23:45] Speaker A: Who gave Neros the gun?
[00:23:49] Speaker B: Find out next week.
[00:23:50] Speaker D: I will let you choose. Is it a single handed paintball gun or is it like a long paintball gun with more range?
[00:23:57] Speaker C: More range.
[00:23:58] Speaker D: Okay, so you will have to use both hands to fire at them.
[00:24:02] Speaker C: I'm not using my spells. I'm in the first world.
[00:24:04] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:24:05] Speaker C: It's scary here.
However, that being said, I grab with gun. The gun.
[00:24:15] Speaker B: And then
[00:24:18] Speaker C: with a focus point, we're bringing out the tentacle arms.
[00:24:23] Speaker A: Baby, you have tenty arms with a gun?
[00:24:27] Speaker C: Yes, sir.
[00:24:30] Speaker A: It's been so long.
[00:24:31] Speaker B: I know.
I'm curious how that works.
[00:24:36] Speaker C: You can just imagine a cephalopod holding a gun.
[00:24:40] Speaker B: Oh, actually no. Octopi are very good at. Is it octopi or octopuses?
[00:24:43] Speaker C: Octopus.
[00:24:44] Speaker B: Doesn't matter.
[00:24:45] Speaker C: It doesn't matter.
[00:24:45] Speaker B: They're very good at articulating.
[00:24:48] Speaker C: Mm.
So I now have cephalopod arms holding a paintball gun in this fantasy campaign.
[00:24:57] Speaker A: I like how you're like, I'm not using magic. It's fine. Instantly. Tentacle arms.
[00:25:01] Speaker C: It's not technically magic.
[00:25:03] Speaker B: That's not magic. It's a part of her.
[00:25:05] Speaker C: It's part of who she is.
[00:25:07] Speaker A: So is my magic.
[00:25:08] Speaker B: My tentacles define me.
[00:25:10] Speaker D: So Neros, you're standing there with your tentacles wrapped around a paintball gun and one action left.
[00:25:17] Speaker A: Shoot him.
[00:25:18] Speaker C: Give me a minute.
[00:25:19] Speaker A: I'm sorry. I'm excited.
[00:25:22] Speaker D: Albert wants blood.
[00:25:25] Speaker C: So that increases my reach by 10ft.
[00:25:28] Speaker A: I'm gonna hold the gun out 10ft in front of me. I could.
[00:25:33] Speaker C: I could.
[00:25:33] Speaker B: I mean, with that you could.
[00:25:34] Speaker C: What's my range with the paintball gun?
[00:25:36] Speaker D: 150ft.
[00:25:39] Speaker A: That's such a powerful paintball gun.
[00:25:44] Speaker B: So now it's 150. No, 160ft.
[00:25:47] Speaker D: I did a quick measure to see how far that gets you. The opposite side of the room on the other side of the circle is 140ft.
[00:25:55] Speaker C: I would like to shoot a paintball at the closest seder.
[00:26:02] Speaker D: Make A ranged strike check.
[00:26:04] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. I don't know what might to hit for. That would be.
[00:26:09] Speaker D: How familiar is Neros with guns?
[00:26:12] Speaker C: I'm gonna say fairly unfamiliar.
[00:26:15] Speaker D: What is your training with martial weapons in general?
[00:26:19] Speaker C: I don't want to tell you.
[00:26:21] Speaker D: Are you untrained with martial weapons?
[00:26:24] Speaker C: Maybe.
Are you gonna make me roll a
[00:26:28] Speaker D: flat D20 if you decide to stick with the longer gun, yeah.
[00:26:36] Speaker C: If I switch it out for another gun. Do I. Can I still hit the first satyr?
[00:26:41] Speaker D: Let me check.
[00:26:43] Speaker C: If I say it really, really cute, will you let me because you love me?
[00:26:47] Speaker D: The cute. The cuteness of the request has no bearing on the validity.
[00:26:52] Speaker C: What if I say pretty please while
[00:26:54] Speaker A: he's looking that up? I googled. Apparently the average paintball gun can shoot 75 to 150ft.
[00:27:00] Speaker C: I love it.
[00:27:00] Speaker A: It's so good.
[00:27:02] Speaker B: Usually you aim for the body.
[00:27:04] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:27:05] Speaker D: There is a simpler one that requires you to reload after every shot. That would be a simple weapon that nearest would know how to use.
[00:27:13] Speaker C: Can we retcon?
[00:27:14] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:27:15] Speaker D: So costing no actions. Neros looks down at the gun she's got and goes, I don't know how to use this one. Sticks it back in and pulls out a simpler one.
[00:27:23] Speaker C: Okay.
Still with my tentacle arms. So I'm holding this thing like 10ft out in front of my body. The recoil on this is going to be intense.
[00:27:35] Speaker D: So go ahead and make a regular ranged strike check like you would with any weapon on your character sheet.
Because we're using automatic bonus progression. So it has all of your regular striking runes and all that.
[00:27:45] Speaker C: Okay.
Oh, they not bad roll.
That's a 41 to hit the first satyr.
[00:27:55] Speaker D: So nearest shot flies true, lands dead center of mass, and just erupts into a green powder.
Like a bright.
[00:28:04] Speaker C: Like neon.
[00:28:05] Speaker D: Yeah, like a neon. Mint green. It's not the most pleasant of greens, but it just erupts all over the satyr in the front.
And you can see underneath the powder. Looks like his chest starts slowly turning gray and hardening a little bit.
[00:28:24] Speaker C: Okay, guys, don't get hit.
Do not get hit.
[00:28:28] Speaker A: I don't like. I don't. I don't like that.
[00:28:31] Speaker D: And as that was the third of Neros actions, it now falls to the satyrs.
[00:28:36] Speaker B: I can't hide.
[00:28:39] Speaker A: I got you.
[00:28:41] Speaker D: One of the two satyrs in the back moves up. He's got his short bow primed, draws his bow alward. You had something prepared for if they shoot?
[00:28:51] Speaker A: Yeah, I do.
So I'm going to cast an amped vector screen so in a 25 foot line, I will say directly from the hedge maids across, it props up like an invisible shimmering wall of telekinetic energy that prevents small, fast moving projectiles from moving through it and traps them in space.
[00:29:21] Speaker D: So he looses his arrow and then, Albert, you cast that spell and his arrow just. And then just gets caught in air. Just like slowly rotating.
[00:29:30] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:29:31] Speaker D: And then he will use his final action to just move through.
[00:29:37] Speaker A: Hold on.
[00:29:38] Speaker D: Does it stop creatures or anything?
[00:29:40] Speaker A: It does not stop them.
[00:29:42] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:29:43] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:29:44] Speaker D: So then he uses his final action just to move up right next to Alward.
[00:29:48] Speaker A: I don't like that.
[00:29:51] Speaker D: And he like slaps his chest and like, deal with it, bro.
[00:29:55] Speaker B: I've set a precedent that I do not like.
[00:29:59] Speaker D: Then the other satyr in the back, he saw that this screen stops his arrows from getting through.
So he just runs straight through right up in front of Neros and then puts his bow away and pulls out a little, like, nightstick that's just covered in the fuchsia powder.
The one that was in the front that Neros hit with with the powder bullet. He shakes off the powder and the gray retracts a little bit back onto him, reaches in, pulls out a powdered nightstick, and then moves up and stops right in front of the field.
[00:30:38] Speaker A: Because he's now out of actions, so it's not instantaneous. You're done if you get hit.
[00:30:45] Speaker C: Right. But I tacked him.
He's out.
[00:30:49] Speaker A: That is true.
[00:30:50] Speaker D: Alward, as you're watching how that works on him, you're realizing they're playing with variant rules, three tags, and you're out. Got it.
Alward, it's your turn. You have got a satyr on either side of you, direct diagonally in front of you, and then one that's 25ft ahead of you on the other side of your vector screen.
[00:31:08] Speaker A: Okay, I'm going to cast time jump, which does not have the manipulate act thing. So they know attacks of opportunity if they have them.
Time is frozen, and I'm going to move forward as far as two movement actions of 35ft will get me.
[00:31:24] Speaker D: That can get you almost to the other end of that pathway, which would put you 40ft away from the circle, which would be base.
[00:31:33] Speaker A: Okay. And then I'm going to amp dancing blade with warp space to select one of the unoccupied weapons in the barrel and bop the one in front of Neros.
[00:31:48] Speaker D: All right, first, tell me what weapon type you're picking just for flavor, and then go ahead and make your strike. Check.
[00:31:55] Speaker A: Do they have one of those like ones that look like a baton, you know what I mean? Like a beat stick, but a baton. Yeah, yeah, those, yeah.
[00:32:05] Speaker D: It's like the same thing that the satyrs have.
[00:32:07] Speaker B: Okay, perfect.
[00:32:08] Speaker A: Yeah, just a nightstick.
[00:32:11] Speaker B: That's good.
[00:32:13] Speaker A: 50.
If I did my math right, I may not have done my math right. 40.
Okay, okay, I added 10.
[00:32:22] Speaker D: I was like. You didn't say nat 20. So you've got a plus 31.
[00:32:26] Speaker A: Sorry, my brain added 10. Okay,
[00:32:31] Speaker D: a 40 is a hit.
[00:32:32] Speaker B: Yay.
[00:32:34] Speaker D: So you bop him, cover him with that green powder. And he starts like on his left shoulder where he got bopped, starts just turning gray.
All right, Zafir, you're standing just a little bit off to the side near the entrance to the hedge maze over towards Neros. Now there's one satyr that's right in front of her that's been tagged once. And then another one that's a little bit closer to you, but it's still like 10ft away from Neros.
Both of them are in range of her tentacles.
[00:33:05] Speaker B: So we don't have to tag them out, we just have to get to the circle.
[00:33:12] Speaker D: Correct.
[00:33:12] Speaker B: So I'm going to assume that you both know that and that you won't solely rely on attacking them. I mean, they're going to attack you. But I'm gonna go into the hedge
[00:33:23] Speaker A: maze is like, I've come for violence.
[00:33:28] Speaker C: She's. She's playing to survive.
[00:33:30] Speaker B: I mean, yes, you do have three coming towards you, but I can't see inside the hedge maze, so I can't really tell you where I'm gonna go.
[00:33:38] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:33:38] Speaker D: You should be able to be to move your pawn on the screen.
[00:33:41] Speaker B: Okay.
Okay, that makes sense. That helps.
[00:33:47] Speaker D: Alright, so for the audience's benefit, the digital map we're using has the hedge maze charted out and visibility is dynamic. So as Zafir explores the maze, he can see what Zafir can see.
[00:33:58] Speaker B: So here's the thing. If I want to do this right, I don't want to go back, you know, unless I hit a dead end because it'd be like, oh, I go this way. But no, wait, no, I still have like this much movement. I'll go this way instead of. I'm not going to do that.
You'll have to excuse my plotting and planning.
Let's do so.
[00:34:21] Speaker D: Zafir has entered the maze and has done a turn to the right, past a turn on his left, and is now taking the second turn on his left.
This is riveting.
You've now made it to a T in the road. You can either turn left or right and that's left and right with orientation to how you entered the maze.
[00:34:43] Speaker B: I'm going to go to the right.
[00:34:48] Speaker D: Uh oh, you've got and you now turning to the right. You've come to another T. One goes back the way you came and one goes north towards the side of the maze you want to be on.
[00:35:00] Speaker B: So to keep things fair.
Wait, what am I at?
[00:35:04] Speaker D: You can take two more steps before you run out.
[00:35:07] Speaker B: But I was going to use those two steps to get back.
[00:35:10] Speaker D: Oh, okay.
[00:35:10] Speaker B: Because I see that and I think if I go up and to the left three spots I do see, the corridor to the left would have gone up, which means there's either a wall or an opening here and I don't want to risk that.
So I'm going to go two spots back and I think that should end my turn.
[00:35:26] Speaker D: It does indeed.
[00:35:28] Speaker B: I thought I was way further into the maze than I am.
[00:35:32] Speaker D: Yeah, so far you're maybe about a quarter of the way into the maze. Whether it's a quarter of the way through the maze or not, who's to say?
Neros.
[00:35:42] Speaker C: Oh, I've been trying to come up with a plan and I don't have a good one.
[00:35:47] Speaker D: So you've got one satyr right up next to you holding a nightstick.
[00:35:50] Speaker C: Yep.
[00:35:50] Speaker D: And another one just off to the side holding a nightstick.
[00:35:52] Speaker C: Yep.
[00:35:53] Speaker A: I do want to remind you of the step action where you're allowed to take a five foot step away and they cannot do attack of opportunity if they have one.
[00:36:03] Speaker D: Ow.
[00:36:04] Speaker C: Don't do that. It hurts.
If this is a trial of skill, Neros is skilled in one main thing.
[00:36:15] Speaker A: Oh, that's true.
[00:36:16] Speaker C: With the tentacle arm that is not holding the paintball gun.
She reaches up and caresses the satyr's cheek and says, we can all be friends here.
[00:36:30] Speaker A: It's so good that they're.
[00:36:31] Speaker C: It has charm on that satyr.
[00:36:36] Speaker D: What is your dc?
[00:36:38] Speaker C: Oh, that's a good question.
[00:36:40] Speaker B: It's a hundred.
[00:36:41] Speaker C: It's charm at first level, by the way. Or first rank DC31.
[00:36:47] Speaker B: I said 100 as a joke.
[00:36:50] Speaker C: What? Honey, why are you pouting?
[00:36:53] Speaker D: Would you like to come take a look at the die?
[00:36:54] Speaker A: I always say he rolled in at 1.
[00:36:56] Speaker D: It's. It's the black ones with the dragon on the inside.
[00:37:01] Speaker A: What was it?
[00:37:03] Speaker C: It's a natural one.
[00:37:04] Speaker A: Hey, that's what we like to see.
[00:37:08] Speaker C: I could kiss you.
[00:37:09] Speaker A: You know, when Nero's and I'm allowed
[00:37:11] Speaker C: to because you're my husband.
[00:37:12] Speaker A: When Nero's turns on the charm, the dice know what to do.
[00:37:16] Speaker C: Critical failure.
So that that one target is helpful and it can't use hostile actions.
[00:37:31] Speaker B: I have so many jokes I could make right now, but I'm not gonna. That was such.
[00:37:34] Speaker A: That was so perfectly timed.
[00:37:39] Speaker D: So as Neros's tentacle strokes the side of the satyr's face, he just gets the biggest puppy dog eyes and then looks over at the other satyr and goes, dude, he is now helpful.
[00:37:53] Speaker C: Can you help me?
[00:37:56] Speaker D: Like, for you, anything.
[00:37:58] Speaker C: Oh, thank you.
Could you tag your friends for us?
[00:38:03] Speaker D: I mean, I'm the best tagger there is.
[00:38:06] Speaker C: I knew you are. I knew you are.
I know you are.
[00:38:10] Speaker A: Oh, it's so good.
[00:38:12] Speaker C: And then she kisses him on the cheek as a thank you.
[00:38:18] Speaker D: Kissing is a free action.
[00:38:19] Speaker C: Kissing is a free action.
So right after she kisses him on the cheek, she, like, pats him with her tentacle.
And then.
What's my movement?
My movement is 25.
Move diagonally northeast 15ft to right in front of where that pit is, and then I blow him a kiss.
And that is the end of my turn.
[00:38:51] Speaker D: All right. And it is the other satyr who is not charmed, but has passed through the warp lens space.
It is his turn.
He looks at his charmed companion with a look of disgust and then turns and darts to the hedge maze.
[00:39:10] Speaker B: No, it's okay. He won't be able to find me.
[00:39:14] Speaker C: He can if he knows what the hedge mage pattern is.
[00:39:17] Speaker B: Well, see, this is where Geordi's expert gming has to come in place.
He needs to decide whether he's going to use his information d force.
He'll use the dice.
[00:39:29] Speaker D: So I rolled a perception check for him.
[00:39:33] Speaker B: I can't see where he is. He's in the dark.
This is so terrifying, we could technically. Oop.
[00:39:41] Speaker A: It's even more terrifying now.
[00:39:42] Speaker B: We could technically just leave him in the dark. Oh, okay.
[00:39:45] Speaker D: And Zafir, you just hear as the satyr just comes dashing out of this, the hedge maze, right up next to you and swipes at you with his powdered stick.
[00:39:55] Speaker A: He had enough actions.
[00:39:57] Speaker D: They're speedy.
[00:39:58] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[00:39:59] Speaker B: Good luck.
[00:39:59] Speaker D: Why'd you have to say that?
Why'd you have to give me luck?
[00:40:05] Speaker A: Did you roll good or bad?
[00:40:07] Speaker D: What's a 29 do for you?
[00:40:09] Speaker B: Oh, no.
Oh, no. I lost the map.
A 29. It's a swing and a miss.
[00:40:17] Speaker D: So he comes dashing out of the hedge maze, swipes with his powdered Nightstick. And you just, like, step aside just in time. And it just whiffs into the hedge, and there's just powder on the hedge.
[00:40:28] Speaker B: Does the hedge start turning to stone?
[00:40:30] Speaker D: Nah, the hedge isn't playing.
[00:40:31] Speaker C: Oh, it's Candy Mountain, Charlie. Candy Mountain.
[00:40:35] Speaker A: Magical. You blurred out Charlie.
[00:40:38] Speaker D: It now goes to the Charmed Satyr.
[00:40:40] Speaker C: It knows the way.
[00:40:41] Speaker D: Who?
He kind of brushes off the green powder that was on his shoulder, and the gray recedes on him as well.
And then he dashes back through the vector screen up to his companion, and he's like, dude, she kissed me. And then whacks him.
[00:40:59] Speaker A: You understand, right, bro?
[00:41:03] Speaker D: And that's a hit.
[00:41:04] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:41:06] Speaker D: He gets coated with the purple powder and starts slowly turning gray as well.
[00:41:11] Speaker C: Has this one been hit twice now?
[00:41:14] Speaker D: He has, but they keep brushing the powder off.
[00:41:18] Speaker C: Right.
[00:41:18] Speaker A: Excuse you, but the rules of the game.
[00:41:21] Speaker C: But he's been hit twice. And if it's variant rules, they have to be hit three times.
So three times you're out. He needs to be hit one more time.
[00:41:28] Speaker B: And he did say we were the aggressors.
[00:41:29] Speaker D: I will say I am not making up any of these rules as we go. Jacob and I ironed out these rules.
[00:41:35] Speaker A: Cheating. Faye Alward. Yes.
[00:41:38] Speaker D: The aggressors are allowed to reverse their tag tag states. The defenders are not. Because the aggressors can only win by tagging the.
[00:41:47] Speaker A: Or, Sorry.
[00:41:48] Speaker D: Defenders can only win by tagging. The aggressors can win by getting in this.
[00:41:51] Speaker A: So we have to tag them three times in one turn or one round?
[00:41:54] Speaker D: Yes and no. They can only lose one tag per round.
[00:42:00] Speaker A: Got it.
[00:42:00] Speaker D: So if you tag them twice, they can only lose one.
[00:42:02] Speaker A: Gotcha.
[00:42:03] Speaker D: So if you focus fire, you'll be able to tag somebody.
You also know, Alward, that if somebody gets out, it's freeze tag rules. Somebody can come and unfreeze them. Oh, the defenders, though, after one turn of being out, can just brush off and kind of come back on their own. Okay, so technically, you guys could win by tagging out all of them at the same time, but it would be really, really hard.
[00:42:31] Speaker A: We'd have to, like, talk and coordinate and be good at the game.
[00:42:35] Speaker C: Or you can just charm everybody.
[00:42:37] Speaker A: I like that idea.
[00:42:38] Speaker C: Just go.
[00:42:40] Speaker D: Now it rolls around to the guy who just got whapped by his friend's turn, and he calmly reaches up, brushes off the powder, puts a hand on his friend's shoulder and goes, I get it, bro. I get it.
Puts his night stick away, pulls out his bow.
[00:43:00] Speaker C: Oh, no.
[00:43:01] Speaker D: And as he's Pulling out his bow, his friend flaps him again.
[00:43:06] Speaker C: Good boy.
[00:43:07] Speaker A: Oh, the reaction.
[00:43:08] Speaker D: This guy rolls rocks.
And he hits him again.
Albert, your turn.
[00:43:17] Speaker A: I'm gonna dismiss my spell to launch the projectile that's caught in it.
[00:43:22] Speaker C: Don't hit my charm. Charmed, baby.
[00:43:24] Speaker A: And hitting the one that is not charmed.
[00:43:26] Speaker C: He's helping us.
[00:43:27] Speaker A: He's very helpful
[00:43:30] Speaker C: because he rolled a natural one.
I'm so pleased.
[00:43:36] Speaker A: 29.
[00:43:37] Speaker D: That's a hit.
[00:43:38] Speaker A: Oh, thank goodness.
[00:43:39] Speaker D: And now he's got green powder on one shoulder, green powder on the other shoulder. And the gray is starting to seep between them all. And you can see it's not just gray. He's gradually turning to stone.
[00:43:50] Speaker A: I feel so bad about this.
[00:43:52] Speaker C: I figured that's what was going on.
[00:43:54] Speaker B: He's not real.
Don't worry.
[00:43:57] Speaker D: So he is now at two tags. A third tag will put him out
[00:44:01] Speaker A: with 70ft of movement. Could I get around the corner? Which corner of the hedge, mage?
[00:44:06] Speaker D: Oh, to the north side of the hedge.
[00:44:07] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:44:08] Speaker D: Yes. It would take you 25ft to round the corner.
[00:44:11] Speaker A: I have 35ft.
[00:44:13] Speaker D: Okay, so 35ft gets you around the corner so that they can't even see you for reference. Albert, it appears that the exit of the hedge maze is one square away from the far left side.
[00:44:28] Speaker A: Got it. And then for my last action, I'm going to concentrate on my dancing blade spell and transport the blade over to the one that's been hit twice.
Not the one that Abby's charmed. Neros is charmed.
[00:44:42] Speaker C: I haven't charmed anybody but my character.
[00:44:44] Speaker A: That's factual. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
[00:44:45] Speaker C: I mean, maybe. Does it count?
[00:44:47] Speaker A: I think it does.
[00:44:50] Speaker C: He's not even paying attention.
[00:44:51] Speaker A: He's not.
[00:44:51] Speaker D: I need a token to keep track of where the thingy is.
[00:44:54] Speaker A: You do.
[00:44:55] Speaker D: Here we go. We'll use Aaron's ax.
[00:44:57] Speaker A: Perfect.
And that's it. It just moves.
[00:45:00] Speaker D: Okay.
All right, Zafir, you are in the hedge maze, and there is one of the satyrs right up next to you. And he's just like.
Like a cheesy sci fi.
[00:45:10] Speaker B: Oh, he is a whole sci fi.
So I was thinking about trying to hit him, but I do not think that I could hit him three times in one. In one go.
Actually, I could, couldn't I?
This will hinge on if I can do this or not. Can I use two cards in one turn?
[00:45:30] Speaker D: In one turn, yes. On the same check, no.
[00:45:33] Speaker B: Okay, so the first card, they're gonna work in tandem. The first one is called. Called foe. Which basically I designate one foe that gives me a plus two status bonus to all attack rolls made against that foe. But then all minus all the other foes are minus four penalty, which at my current spot, I don't think I could even do. The second card, it basically allows me to ignore the map or the multiple attack penalty. If and if I roll a critical success, I just get a normal success.
But if it fails, I drop my weapon.
So I'm using both of those.
So I've got a plus two to attack on this guy with my needle that I grabbed.36 to hit.
[00:46:21] Speaker D: That's a hit.
[00:46:22] Speaker B: Okay. Does damage matter?
[00:46:24] Speaker D: No, it's just tags. Okay, so he's been tagged once. There's a poof of powder cascades across his chest.
[00:46:30] Speaker B: All right, so now we're going to do the second one without the map.
I hate math, but I could tell you it's higher than a 9, so it's probably going to hit. It's a 15 plus 25 plus 2.
[00:46:41] Speaker D: That's a hit.
[00:46:42] Speaker B: All right. And then what does the third hit do for me in regards to penalty?
[00:46:49] Speaker D: So since your knitting needle is active agile, it'll be a minus eight on your normal bonus. But then you get a plus two from your card, so it's a minus six from your normal.
[00:46:59] Speaker B: Cool.
I rolled a 19.
[00:47:05] Speaker D: That'll do it.
[00:47:06] Speaker A: Nice.
[00:47:06] Speaker B: So 19 minus six plus 25 plus two.
[00:47:11] Speaker D: So Zafir, that hits.
So you rapidly just lash out with your knitting needle. Just poof, poof, poof. And just as the powder cascades over him and clears, there's just a stone statue of a stater, a satyr standing.
A stone statue of a satyr standing in the gap.
[00:47:31] Speaker A: New tongue twister unlocked.
[00:47:33] Speaker B: I'm over here trying to celebrate. It was like, okay, finish so I can celebrate also. You said.
What did you say?
[00:47:40] Speaker D: A stone statue of a satyr standing in this.
[00:47:42] Speaker B: No, I think he swapped or something. I don't know.
[00:47:45] Speaker D: You whapped him.
[00:47:45] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, that. That. That takes care of. My turn. And now there's. Hopefully this isn't the only way through the maze, because if somebody else goes
[00:47:54] Speaker D: in it, currently, one satyr is tagged and another is tag 2.
That was not clear. One satyr is entirely tagged, and one of them is at 2 out of 3 tags. The other one is Charmed Neros.
[00:48:08] Speaker C: I have a plan. I don't know if it's gonna work.
I hope it works.
[00:48:15] Speaker A: Have faith.
[00:48:16] Speaker C: First of all, I'm going to give our wonderful GM a hero card or Hero point card.
[00:48:24] Speaker D: Oh, thanks.
[00:48:25] Speaker C: To give him disadvantage.
[00:48:26] Speaker B: Oh, don't count your chickens before they hatch.
[00:48:31] Speaker C: Second, I'm going to use one of my feats called quickened casting.
It is a free action to do so.
Third, I haven't even used an action yet.
I'm going to use my first action.
Two.
I'm so mean.
Cast charm on the uncharmed satyr.
[00:48:55] Speaker A: Please work.
[00:48:57] Speaker C: You have disadvantage.
[00:48:58] Speaker B: Man, the difference.
[00:48:59] Speaker A: I think this is the first time you've cast Charmed at range. Yeah, sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt you.
[00:49:05] Speaker D: Meets it. Beats it.
[00:49:07] Speaker C: Even with disadvantage, I hate you.
I mean, I love you.
[00:49:12] Speaker A: Oh, wait. Meets it. I'm dumb. I didn't mean to celebrate there. I got confused.
[00:49:16] Speaker C: I love you, but that's so frustrating.
Okay, I still have two actions left
[00:49:24] Speaker D: for the audience's benefit. If a creature succeeds on their save against charm, it does nothing.
[00:49:29] Speaker C: Yeah. It's only a critical success that they are aware that I tried to charm them. So he's not even aware that I tried, which is good for me.
Oh, crap.
I never reloaded my paintball baby.
I have two actions left.
I'm gonna reload and then shoot the uncharmed satyr.
[00:49:54] Speaker D: All right, make a strike check.
[00:49:56] Speaker C: Gosh, I never have to make strike checks with Neros. This is weird.
Not horrid, but I'm not great with weapons either, so.38.
[00:50:09] Speaker D: That's a hit.
That second satyr is now also out. There's only one satyr that is not out, and he is charmed.
[00:50:16] Speaker C: Do not hurt him.
[00:50:18] Speaker A: What if you can convince him to hurt himself?
[00:50:21] Speaker C: I'm not gonna do that.
[00:50:22] Speaker A: It would be helpful to us.
[00:50:23] Speaker C: I could kiss him and then be like, tag yourself three times.
[00:50:27] Speaker B: But wait, doesn't that just mean we win?
[00:50:31] Speaker A: Yeah, because he's not gonna untag his friends.
[00:50:33] Speaker B: Well, how long does your charm last?
[00:50:35] Speaker C: An hour.
[00:50:36] Speaker B: So as long as I can get out of this maze within an hour.
[00:50:39] Speaker A: Two hours later.
[00:50:42] Speaker D: So the satyr in the maze is just stone, but, like, his fingers start to twitch and his turn ins.
[00:50:50] Speaker A: Oh, right. You did say eventually, though. Yeah.
[00:50:54] Speaker D: So he is still currently out, but at the start of his next turn, he'll. Then he'll begin to untag himself.
It is now the charmed Satyr's turn.
[00:51:04] Speaker C: He's helpful to me. For an hour, he is just sits
[00:51:08] Speaker A: there and pokes his tagged friend.
[00:51:10] Speaker D: He walks up to Neros, lays a hand on her arm.
[00:51:15] Speaker C: Oh.
[00:51:15] Speaker D: And gestures over to the gauntlet of traps behind her.
Hey, baby, you wanna. You wanna go like Trap skating with me.
[00:51:24] Speaker A: Don't do it. There's a perfectly good path right there.
[00:51:29] Speaker C: Not right now.
[00:51:31] Speaker D: Okay, Okay, I see how it is.
Whatever.
[00:51:35] Speaker C: I said no right now. That doesn't mean not never.
[00:51:37] Speaker D: Well, like, when I don't listen, I don't know.
[00:51:41] Speaker C: I have a lot of things going on right now.
[00:51:44] Speaker D: Okay, well, and he starts, like, walking away slowly, but he, like, turns back and does the call me gesture.
The other satyr that got tagged out by a teamwork of several people.
His fingers twitch, and he starts getting ready to move again, but he is still out alward. Your turn.
You're at the top of the hedge maze, like, 30ft away from the victory zone.
[00:52:11] Speaker A: I mean, I could go into the victory zone and wait, but I think I'm gonna wait for everyone to do that.
Okay. I.
I'm. I. I want to continue concentrating on dancing blade so it stays up, and I don't have any other option apart from move or strike. So I'm just gonna strike the frozen sa.
[00:52:32] Speaker D: I'm gonna go ahead and take him
[00:52:33] Speaker A: back up to full stone, and then I'm just going to prepare. Use my last two actions to prepare to run to the thing when my friends get up here.
[00:52:45] Speaker B: All right, Zafir, I have a question.
[00:52:49] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:52:50] Speaker B: If I were to stab this guy, would that be considered continuous to strikes? Because, like, he would be like, I'm gonna unstone myself, and then, oh, I'm stabbed. I can't do it.
Oh, no. You know.
[00:53:08] Speaker A: Oh, he's asking if he, like, if
[00:53:10] Speaker B: I put it inside his skin, would that continuously. I don't think you can negate healing.
[00:53:19] Speaker D: However, the knitting needle has, like, a poofy on the end for just applying powder with a strike. If you were to attempt to put it inside of him, that would be considered harming him.
[00:53:29] Speaker A: Could he just lay it on top of him?
[00:53:31] Speaker D: No. That breaks the spirit of the rules.
Well, does it?
Zafir, make a nature check.
[00:53:39] Speaker B: Okay, that's a six. 17.
Wait, hold on. 21.
[00:53:45] Speaker D: 21.
You are not sure whether that would be counted cheating or not.
But just laying it on top of him to make him continually tagged may have the intended effect of freezing him tagged until somebody else takes it off. Or it might be considered cheating and will put you immediately out.
[00:54:06] Speaker B: How many actions would it take to lay it down on the floor before
[00:54:08] Speaker D: him
[00:54:11] Speaker B: steps on it?
[00:54:12] Speaker A: Technically, that's dropping. It's a free action.
[00:54:14] Speaker D: So I would let you just drop it as a free action if you wanted to plant it in such a way that if he moves towards you, then he would step on it. I would make that be an interact action and either use crafting or deception to, like, set a trap, essentially.
[00:54:29] Speaker B: You know, I'm just going to run. Okay, There's. There's too many. Too many variables. I'm just going to run.
Okay, let's go another 10 up and to the right. 10, which I totally could have gone that direction.
[00:54:43] Speaker D: As you walk past those purple mushrooms that are marked on the map.
[00:54:45] Speaker B: Purple mushrooms?
[00:54:46] Speaker D: One of them just opens its mouth and just.
[00:54:51] Speaker B: Oh, can I get a glance on that?
[00:54:54] Speaker D: Yeah, it's just a screaming mushroom.
[00:54:56] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:54:57] Speaker C: I'm gonna alert them where you are in the maze. That's not nice.
[00:55:01] Speaker B: Well, I mean, who's gonna. Who's gonna know?
[00:55:04] Speaker A: How are they gonna know?
[00:55:05] Speaker C: How would they know?
[00:55:06] Speaker D: On the other side of the maze, you just hear,
[00:55:10] Speaker B: hey, that should give you an idea what you should be doing too.
Tell me how to get out.
How many?
Hold on.
Oh, man, I think I'm going the wrong way.
Oh, wait, wait. There's a path up here.
[00:55:23] Speaker D: That's two actions.
[00:55:25] Speaker A: Having a solve a maze.
[00:55:27] Speaker B: No.
[00:55:28] Speaker A: When we can't see anything is diabolical.
[00:55:31] Speaker B: This is not good.
[00:55:33] Speaker A: Oh, no, no.
[00:55:35] Speaker D: For the audience's benefit, what they're all saying. Oh, no about is he has now found that he's looped in a dead end.
[00:55:41] Speaker B: So how many actions do I have left?
[00:55:43] Speaker D: You can take two more steps.
[00:55:48] Speaker B: I'm gonna stay here.
Stay where I am.
[00:55:51] Speaker D: All right, Neros, it's your turn.
[00:55:54] Speaker C: Okay, so my charmed boyfriend is gone?
[00:56:00] Speaker D: No, he's just walking away, sadly, but he's still helpful.
[00:56:03] Speaker C: Oh, where is he? Is he still, like, in front of me like that?
[00:56:07] Speaker D: Yeah, he's like 10ft away from you right now.
[00:56:10] Speaker C: I, first of all, am going to cast haste on myself.
[00:56:15] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:56:17] Speaker C: That would require an action.
I'm gonna do it anyway for the bit.
Step up to him.
[00:56:24] Speaker D: Hip, hip.
He turns around, he's like, what, are
[00:56:31] Speaker A: you gonna throw him in the pit?
[00:56:32] Speaker C: No.
[00:56:33] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:56:34] Speaker C: I'm not. Because if I did that, he'd turn hostile again.
[00:56:37] Speaker A: He'd be in the pit. Yeah, it's a two mile down pit.
[00:56:42] Speaker B: He could be hostile.
[00:56:42] Speaker C: Well, he's a satyr. He can climb that wall like a goat.
[00:56:46] Speaker A: Two miles.
[00:56:49] Speaker B: He'd be dead.
That would be.
[00:56:52] Speaker C: You don't know that. That could also be considered cheating.
[00:56:54] Speaker A: That's true.
[00:56:55] Speaker C: And I don't want to do that.
Grab his face with my tentacles.
Well, not like. And not like envelop his face.
[00:57:04] Speaker D: Oh, just like.
[00:57:05] Speaker C: Yes. Like that.
[00:57:07] Speaker D: Okay. Just one tentacle on either side.
[00:57:09] Speaker C: More. Yes, More. Sweet. And I kiss him.
[00:57:12] Speaker D: Well, that's a free action.
[00:57:15] Speaker B: This guy's getting a lot of action today.
[00:57:18] Speaker C: Well, this is the skill challenge.
[00:57:21] Speaker B: Oh, that's true.
[00:57:22] Speaker C: This is what she is skilled at.
Use your. Use your strengths.
[00:57:26] Speaker B: Makes sense why I'm really being mazed. I lost the words.
[00:57:33] Speaker C: So that's the end of my turn.
Kissing a satyr.
[00:57:37] Speaker D: All right, we won't tell gwbs.
[00:57:40] Speaker C: Do not tell gwibs. None of you tell gwibs.
I'm. This is. This is for survival.
[00:57:46] Speaker A: GWIBS would understand.
[00:57:47] Speaker C: GWIBS would hopefully understand.
[00:57:49] Speaker D: And as Neros is hasting and kissing a satyr, the satyr that is in the hedge maze regains a little bit of movement. Some of the dust begins falling off. He's not quite fully stone. He looks around.
He rolls really well. To guess that Zafir has not tried to squeeze past him. He doesn't see any footprint.
He sees a tile where somebody's thought about maybe setting a knitting needle down there.
And he starts moving deeper into the hedge maze.
And he rounds the corner to see Zafir, but he's, like, moving really awkwardly, and he's like, hey, that's the end of his turn.
[00:58:29] Speaker B: How'd he get out so fast?
[00:58:31] Speaker D: He's speedy.
[00:58:32] Speaker B: I mean, like, wasn't he on his side second or so?
[00:58:35] Speaker A: He lost a whole round. And then after that, he got to. He's basically slowed, too.
[00:58:41] Speaker B: Oh, right. Okay, okay, right, Exactly.
[00:58:43] Speaker D: I'm using the slowed condition.
[00:58:44] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:58:46] Speaker D: All right. It is now the Charmed satyr's turn. He's like, those are pretty good catch.
Was there anything else you wanted?
[00:58:57] Speaker C: Yeah, if you could continue bopping your friend over there if he starts to wake up, that would be great.
[00:59:02] Speaker D: Oh, sure.
[00:59:03] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:59:03] Speaker D: Yeah, I could do that. I'm a goatbopper.
And he walks over to his buddy and just starts, bop, bop, bop, bop on his head.
And that's where we'll leave him.
His buddy is still petrified and just remains stone, continually being bopped. Albert, it's your turn.
[00:59:22] Speaker A: Albert's gonna peek around the corner. Just take a step and peek around the corner and see the scene.
Nero saw you coming.
[00:59:31] Speaker C: Eventually.
[00:59:32] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:59:33] Speaker C: It's taken me a minute, but I'm on my way.
[00:59:35] Speaker A: Okay. And then I'm going to run to the entrance of the maze and yell down at Zyphia, are you coming?
I don't know if he can hear me.
[00:59:46] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:59:48] Speaker A: And then I'm gonna use my last action to sustain the dancing blade and bop him.
[00:59:55] Speaker D: This stone satyr is just bop, bop,
[00:59:57] Speaker A: bop, bop, bop, bop.
[00:59:59] Speaker C: This poor satyr.
[01:00:01] Speaker A: That's my turn.
[01:00:02] Speaker D: Zafir, it's your turn.
[01:00:04] Speaker B: All right. Recall on. Not recall. But you've allowed me to do nature checks for free with knowing the rules are the only rules that you can't cause harm.
[01:00:23] Speaker D: There are more rules than that. Is there something particular you're thinking about doing that might be against the rules?
[01:00:31] Speaker B: Navigating the terrain in an unconventional. I want to fly.
[01:00:45] Speaker D: Entirely irrelevant to the rules of the game.
Nothing to say against flying.
[01:00:51] Speaker B: Okay.
[01:00:52] Speaker D: It was a strange way of phrasing it, but the rules of the game do not prohibit you from doing things like flying. Turning into a giant purple worm.
[01:01:01] Speaker B: Okay.
[01:01:01] Speaker D: It's just. They don't want you to hurt the other players because it's just a game.
[01:01:04] Speaker B: Okay.
I cast fly on myself.
[01:01:07] Speaker D: Okay.
[01:01:08] Speaker B: And I.
Well, Neros probably. Actually, no. Both nearest and outward burn probably would be able to see me just start levitating out of the.
Out of the hedge maze.
And since I've never actually flown before.
[01:01:23] Speaker A: How does it look?
[01:01:24] Speaker B: How. How tall is the hedge maze?
[01:01:27] Speaker D: Maybe eight feet.
[01:01:28] Speaker B: Eight feet. Wow. That's pretty high for me.
[01:01:30] Speaker C: Whoa.
[01:01:31] Speaker A: Oh. Because you can see everything.
[01:01:32] Speaker C: Oh, my God.
[01:01:33] Speaker D: I turned off token visibility so that you guys can see the entirety of the maze.
[01:01:37] Speaker C: Oh, he went the complete wrong way.
[01:01:39] Speaker A: Yeah. There was no way you be able to get through.
[01:01:41] Speaker C: Oh, it would have taken him forever.
[01:01:44] Speaker A: Oh, my goodness.
[01:01:46] Speaker C: That's insane.
[01:01:47] Speaker A: That's such a roundabout way.
[01:01:49] Speaker D: I had a lot of fun making
[01:01:50] Speaker B: this maze and I'm just.
[01:01:52] Speaker C: Wait.
[01:01:53] Speaker B: You flying right over it.
[01:01:54] Speaker A: Oh, it's really good.
[01:01:56] Speaker D: So you would have to spend 10ft of movement or. Excuse me. It's difficult terrain to go directly up. So it would take 15ft of movement to clear the maze. And then you still have 10ft of movement left once you've cleared the wall of the maze.
[01:02:09] Speaker B: All right, so the two of you see over this eight foot just. He rises like a Marvel person flying. You know, where they have the hands next to him.
[01:02:18] Speaker A: Howard points.
[01:02:19] Speaker B: His feet are kind of pointed.
He just rises over.
I don't know how thick the walls are, but I'm gonna go towards the goal.
Just fly in there, you know, catch
[01:02:31] Speaker D: up in the wall.
[01:02:32] Speaker B: So it would let your token move just casually flying.
[01:02:37] Speaker D: All right, Neros, you see Zafir fly over the top of the hedge maze. It is your turn.
[01:02:43] Speaker C: Okay, I'm going. My haste has kicked in.
I'm going to start moving up.
So 10.
Oh, I can land on his square.
[01:02:55] Speaker A: He is technically friendly to you right now.
[01:02:57] Speaker C: Okay, give him a quick smooch on the cheek.
[01:03:00] Speaker D: Kissing is a free action.
[01:03:02] Speaker C: How far can I get with all of my hasty actions?
[01:03:06] Speaker D: With all of your hasty actions, you can get to 100ft.
[01:03:11] Speaker C: Whee.
[01:03:13] Speaker D: So you could go all the way to here.
[01:03:16] Speaker C: Okay. I am right outside the purple circle. I have finally made it. And I will wait there for my
[01:03:23] Speaker D: friends and I. I don't think we need to play this one out in turn order. Now that all of you have an unimpeded motion to the center. The satyr that's inside, just like as he's brushing off dust, starts trying to climb the wall. He's like, no.
No.
Meanwhile, the other satyr is just on the other side of the map. Bop, bop, bop.
As the three of you just casually make your way into the victory circle.
[01:03:54] Speaker B: That's amazing.
[01:03:56] Speaker C: I feel like the other satyr finally gets out and is like, stop tearing into stone. What are you doing?
[01:04:01] Speaker D: You're tearing this family apart, bro.
[01:04:04] Speaker C: But she kissed me, man.
[01:04:07] Speaker A: My apologies, bro. I didn't understand.
[01:04:10] Speaker D: And as you all stand in the circle, a bright flash of white light blinds you. And when it clears, you're standing back in the marble chamber with only one arch left in front of you.
[01:04:22] Speaker C: That was amazing.
[01:04:24] Speaker D: And that's where we'll end this episode.
[01:04:27] Speaker A: I loved that.
[01:04:28] Speaker C: That was great.
[01:04:30] Speaker B: That was the least baddiest combat in the combat.
[01:04:34] Speaker A: I genuinely love how much fun you're having with this face. Shenaniganery, Jordi. It's a good.
[01:04:48] Speaker D: And the hero point for this episode goes to Abby for the tactical decision of swapping one of the teammates onto your side. With charm and the fortune of the dice agreeing with you.
[01:05:01] Speaker C: I mean, they agreed with me the one time, and that's all it took.
I. I was hoping to get two on our side and it make it so much easier, but I tried.
[01:05:12] Speaker D: Just two of them just whapping the other guy.
[01:05:15] Speaker C: Yeah. Or just be like, hey, can you just let us pass? That would be great.
[01:05:18] Speaker B: Or just, hey, go into that maze and get lost for a while. Aww. Get lost.
[01:05:23] Speaker C: You're my best friend.
[01:05:24] Speaker B: Get lost.
[01:05:25] Speaker A: Just for a while.
[01:05:28] Speaker C: Anyway. Thanks.
I am going to probably.
What do I want to do?
What do I want to do?
[01:05:37] Speaker A: You gotta stop setting me up to say drugs.
[01:05:40] Speaker C: I'm not doing drugs.
[01:05:41] Speaker A: You gotta stop it.
[01:05:43] Speaker B: That sounds suspicious.
[01:05:48] Speaker C: No, I'm probably gonna go continue to sing to myself for a while.
[01:05:53] Speaker A: Salad.
[01:05:54] Speaker D: And we will see you all in the next episode.
This has been an Atomic Broadcasting production. If you enjoyed the show, make sure to give us some support by liking, commenting and following. These things really do make a difference in getting the word out and helping our community grow. Also, make sure to check us out on threads and check out the Discord server where you can chat with other fans and discuss all the recent developments and happenings. Links to all these good things in the description below. The Written and the Lost is an original story that uses trademarks and or copyrights owned by Paizo, Inc. Used under Pyzzi Paizo's Fan Content Policy. Atomic Broadcasting and the Written and the Lost are not published, endorsed or specifically approved by Paizo. For more information about Paizo, Inc. And paizo products, visit paizo.com hope to see you all in the next episode. Until then, have an Atomic Time.
