EP. 129 Riddles in the Sand

[00:00:05] Speaker A: You are listening to an atomic broadcasting production. [00:00:08] Speaker B: So sit back, relax and enjoy the feature presentation. [00:00:13] Speaker A: And remember, do your part. [00:00:15] Speaker B: Such as like comment rate and don't forget to tell a friend to tune in for an atomic time. [00:00:31] Speaker C: Now, where did we leave off? [00:00:35] Speaker B: Ah, yes. [00:00:38] Speaker C: Uwe and Val teleported across the continent to the dwarven citadel of Tar Kasmuk, where they were stopped by a suspicious guard. As they fielded probing questions from the obstinate dwarf, they were approached by another figure. Hey, welcome everybody. [00:01:01] Speaker D: That's not how we start these. [00:01:03] Speaker C: No, it isn't. But not every day am I so excited to introduce our guest. [00:01:08] Speaker A: I'm throwing everything off. I'm so sorry. [00:01:11] Speaker D: So Sven, I was thinking about that banter that we could do. [00:01:14] Speaker C: Yeah, no, we need to introduce our guest. [00:01:18] Speaker B: No, this is perfect. Introducing with this. [00:01:20] Speaker D: Oh, that is true. Actually, we would have opinions on our banter. [00:01:24] Speaker A: I have opinions on a lot of things. [00:01:26] Speaker C: If you've been following our shows, you probably have already met Steven. But if you are only listening to the written Lost, this is Steven's debut on this show. So Steven, do you want to introduce yourself? [00:01:36] Speaker A: Hi, I'm Stephen. You can call me Harold. Almost everybody does. Yeah. This is my first time on the Written in the Lost. I have been a fan of the show ever since you guys started it. And this is kind of wild being here. You might have heard me in my other roles. I've been on well one season and will be two seasons of the Records of the Unknown. [00:02:00] Speaker D: You are uncredited at House on Valley Lane. [00:02:03] Speaker A: Uncredited in House on Valley Lane. If you were wondering who is the paramedic who gave that amazing performance and then you went into the credits and there was nobody listed under paramedic. Well, I'm here to tell you right now that that was me. [00:02:20] Speaker D: It was on. It was on my list. I don't know why it's not there. [00:02:23] Speaker A: Not only is it not in the credits in the show notes, it's not in the credits at the end of the production. [00:02:28] Speaker D: Also, by the time this episode comes out, that's gonna be fixed. Cause I'm fixing it this week so [00:02:33] Speaker A: all of this is completely irrelevant. You may also know me as my brief st. You said this is my first time on the written and Lost, which is technically true. [00:02:45] Speaker C: Not exactly. [00:02:46] Speaker A: Not exactly true. Because if you go to the Patreon and you listen to the pre modern Prometheus, which is a canon side adventure, I played a character named Lucien Adelbrook in that short adventure. [00:02:59] Speaker B: That is true. [00:03:00] Speaker D: I'd like to address the fact that he's now promoted our Patreon more than we have on this show. [00:03:04] Speaker B: Congratulations. [00:03:04] Speaker A: Listen, I told you I was a fan. I'm just trying to help you out here. So, yeah, that's me. I am so, so happy and excited to be here. [00:03:16] Speaker D: You were also the Starfinder. Tooie Playtest. [00:03:19] Speaker A: That's right. Thank you for reminding me. [00:03:20] Speaker D: You were Vorp. [00:03:21] Speaker A: I was the Great and Mighty Vorp. And I was also the emcee for the wrap up for that. [00:03:28] Speaker D: Oh, yeah. That was great. [00:03:30] Speaker A: I was. Thank you. And the last thing I would like to say before I send it back over to Jordi is, hi, mom. Because I know you're gonna listen to this. [00:03:40] Speaker D: I won't. You're right. [00:03:42] Speaker C: What? Sam won't listen to this. [00:03:44] Speaker A: Hi, Sam's mom. Anyway, yeah, so that's me. I'm so happy to be here. [00:03:51] Speaker B: Yay. We're happy to have you. [00:03:54] Speaker C: It's going to be fun. Now, with introductions out of the way, I would like to introduce you. Stephen, since you never listened to the show, being a big fan, get what [00:04:03] Speaker A: I just said about being a fan. [00:04:05] Speaker C: So we have a really structured and dignified, refined way that we always start our episodes. So we always come to the table and we talk about, like, deep and important topics. You know, things that resonate with all of mankind, because we. We need to be relatable. So I'm sure one of you has one of these topics of great import. [00:04:27] Speaker D: I saw Sweeney Todd the other day. [00:04:31] Speaker A: That's a pretty good movie. [00:04:32] Speaker C: Does he live in? [00:04:33] Speaker D: I saw it at the local. Like the play. It was a musical. [00:04:36] Speaker A: The production. [00:04:37] Speaker D: It was a musical. Jenkins already did his review in an earlier episode. He assured me he would. And so now I'd like to give a quick review of Sweeney Todd, the musical. [00:04:47] Speaker A: So please, patron of the arts, [00:04:51] Speaker D: there are pies and people are in them. Thank you. So what Sen and I were thinking about talking about, do we want to talk about what we were talking about [00:05:02] Speaker B: talking about are your thoughts. [00:05:03] Speaker D: I don't think he actually knows this. [00:05:06] Speaker B: What are your possible thoughts about Warhammer 40K? Caiaphas Kane? [00:05:14] Speaker A: I know some of those words, [00:05:17] Speaker D: but you know the important ones. [00:05:19] Speaker A: Yeah, I know Warhammer 40K. Yes. I have a small collection myself. I don't know what Caiaphas Kane is. [00:05:29] Speaker D: Oh, that's a bummer. You would love it. [00:05:30] Speaker B: You would. He is the most decorated commissar of the Imperium. [00:05:35] Speaker A: Oh, he's imperial. [00:05:37] Speaker D: But he's a dork. [00:05:38] Speaker B: Yeah, he's a dork. [00:05:39] Speaker A: He's chaos all the way. Baby heretic. [00:05:43] Speaker D: He is the most like, self serving, incompetent guy who succeeds at everything because of him being self serving and accidentally stumbling into the correct thing. [00:05:52] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:05:53] Speaker C: Zap Brannigan. [00:05:54] Speaker B: He. [00:05:55] Speaker A: Oh, is he the Zap Brannigan of more his. [00:05:57] Speaker D: His like, servant? Best friend? Dude is Jurgen. [00:06:01] Speaker B: Jurgen. [00:06:01] Speaker D: He's a blank with a melted gun. [00:06:05] Speaker A: Well, as I said earlier, I have opinions on a lot of things. I have no opinions on things. [00:06:10] Speaker D: Okay, well, that was a dead end. [00:06:12] Speaker A: That's a dead end. Bad banter topic. [00:06:14] Speaker D: I'm sorry we were thrown off by Jordy starting this banter. Listen, me and Sven spent like an hour and a half talking about Caius Biscayne the other day. [00:06:23] Speaker B: We did. [00:06:25] Speaker D: We liked the books. I listened. I finished Cavs of Ice. I started the third one, the Traitor's Hand. [00:06:29] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. [00:06:30] Speaker D: It's been pretty good so far, most of the way through it. [00:06:32] Speaker B: I've started the third series myself. So if you want to learn more about Caiaphas Kane, read the books. [00:06:38] Speaker A: You want me to read or listen to them like a nerd? [00:06:42] Speaker D: The audiobooks are really good. [00:06:44] Speaker A: Well, I love audiobooks. Yeah. I'm a nerd. Yeah. Jordy, I have a question for you. Okay. Who is your favorite player at this table and why? [00:06:56] Speaker C: Cut this out, Jacob. Cut this out. [00:06:58] Speaker A: There is an objectively correct answer, and Abby's not here. Oh, well, I guess I kind of [00:07:03] Speaker B: missed an objectively correct. [00:07:05] Speaker C: There actually is a very easy answer to that question. A completely undisputable, you don't count as a player. Non questionable answer. My favorite player at your table right now, Harold, is you. [00:07:16] Speaker A: Dang. He got me. [00:07:17] Speaker D: I am at this table. I'm at the table. I'm at both tables. I am in between both of these tables. [00:07:25] Speaker A: Only half of you. [00:07:26] Speaker C: Is there a man you don't like? [00:07:27] Speaker A: My right half. No, no, Sam, look at it this way. He likes me more than your right half. [00:07:34] Speaker C: Not. [00:07:34] Speaker A: Not me more than all of you. [00:07:36] Speaker D: I like you less than I like half of him. [00:07:38] Speaker C: Exactly. [00:07:41] Speaker D: Wait. I like you more than I would like half of him. And where does that give me. And I like him less than I like half of him. The other half of him. So Sven is the least half liked. [00:07:52] Speaker C: To any of our listeners who have not seen our recording setup, we have a total of three tables with side tables. [00:07:59] Speaker D: One's a circle, two of them are long square rectangles, and one's a circle. [00:08:04] Speaker B: One of them is. Or if you count my table, one of them is the Rune to go back to Earth and Stargate. [00:08:11] Speaker A: So, Jordy, is this the dignified, hard hitting topics that we've come to expect from the banter or. [00:08:17] Speaker D: Yeah, well, so you missed last time when we talked about PlayStation 1 and Xbox 360 games. [00:08:21] Speaker A: Oh, Xbox 360 all the way. [00:08:23] Speaker D: No, just. We didn't compare anything. We just talked about our joy. Sorry. Everything has to be a comparison. And then we talked about Spider Man. [00:08:37] Speaker A: I like Spider Man. [00:08:38] Speaker C: We're all winners here. [00:08:45] Speaker D: Get rid of him. I don't want him here. [00:08:49] Speaker C: We broke Sven. [00:08:52] Speaker A: I. I'm just happy to be here, guys. I don't know what to do. [00:09:00] Speaker C: I do. I'm gonna start looking back and forth between your papers again. [00:09:08] Speaker B: I thought this would be easier with less people, not harder. [00:09:12] Speaker C: And at that moment, a new figure approaches, clad in a similar shade of blue as this dwarf that you've been speaking with, but with an entirely different aspect to her bearing, and dressed very differently. Steven, would you introduce your character? [00:09:31] Speaker A: Yeah. So, approaching Val and Hire is a human woman, middle aged, as Geordi said. She has the blue sash and the silver pendant, but she is wearing a full set of heavy plate armor. Slung to her back is a tower shield, and she has a warhammer kind of hung at her side. You might notice that she's wearing kind of circular spectacles that keep sliding down her nose and she's pushing them up as she walks up to you. Her hair is kind of wavy in a messy bun. And she'll walk up and say, what seems to be the problem? [00:10:21] Speaker C: Oh, Delilah. These two had just arrived through the teleporter circle, and if I may say, they're mighty suspicious. [00:10:29] Speaker A: Let me see their paperwork, please. [00:10:30] Speaker C: And he hands the paperwork over. [00:10:32] Speaker D: Also, it's three. My Sigurd is here t these two [00:10:36] Speaker C: people and a bird. [00:10:37] Speaker A: The bird's not on the paperwork. [00:10:40] Speaker C: It's right there. Sorry. Page three. [00:10:41] Speaker D: Oh, I almost forgot to put it in. I wrote it on the back. [00:10:45] Speaker A: I see. Well, this is highly irregular. Your Val. [00:10:52] Speaker D: Yes. [00:10:52] Speaker A: And you're. And she reads Uver's name and pauses. Uver Starkvind. [00:11:02] Speaker B: Yes. [00:11:04] Speaker A: Not the Uvaire. Starkvind. [00:11:09] Speaker B: He frowns for a moment, like trying to figure out what you meant by the Uwe Starkfiend. I am the only Uwehrstakfiend that I am aware of. Are you there? Someone else? [00:11:24] Speaker A: She leans closer to you, as if examining you. Her eyes maybe looking a little bigger thanks to her glasses. How old are you? [00:11:38] Speaker B: You see this look of befuddlement? [00:11:42] Speaker A: I'm sorry? That's rude. I'll take responsibility for them. [00:11:50] Speaker C: It's your funeral. And he just, like, chuckles and walks off to a desk and you look [00:11:56] Speaker B: back and Uvir is pointing at his paperwork where it has his birth date [00:12:02] Speaker A: by the stars. It is you. [00:12:06] Speaker D: How. [00:12:08] Speaker A: I'm sorry. I'm being rude. My name is Delilah. Hello, Delilah Degray. You can call me Del or Deli or Delilah, whichever you want. I've been. As you might have noticed, I'm not a dwarf, which clearly. But they've been very welcoming to me here at Tarkazmuk. But I've been studying to be. I'm a Blue Order, you see, and I had to take a lot of courses in order to, you know, really integrate here. And your books are in the curriculum. U and to my knowledge, have been for some time. [00:12:52] Speaker B: P Also frowns. I didn't realize that they would go so far. I wrote those over a summer when I was teaching at the time. Tales and Stories of Zenoms in Warbrook. If I remember correctly, they didn't have. It was very outdated. [00:13:15] Speaker A: I did like your work on that one. My favorite was A Short History of Dwarves, which I did think the title was a little bit insensitive, but I figured, well, who am I to say? [00:13:28] Speaker B: Yes, my fellow professors at the time were not as amused as I was. But I think it is a bit on the nose, don't you agree? And a bit tongue in cheek, considering our ancient history. [00:13:43] Speaker A: Indeed, I would agree. I also loved your treatise on temporal mechanics. [00:13:50] Speaker B: That one? That one took more time than I thought. [00:13:55] Speaker A: More time. As Val laughs, it's almost as if she's realizing you're there for the first time, even though she did acknowledge you before. But. Oh, I'm being rude again. Hi, I'm Delilah. She'll hold out her very armored gauntlet of a hand. [00:14:20] Speaker D: Hi, Delilah. My name's Val. [00:14:23] Speaker A: Um, she kind of looks back over your papers. What brings you back? And you too, Tarkasmuk. [00:14:31] Speaker B: I'm actually here to meet an old acquaintance, Orvus Geordi. [00:14:38] Speaker A: Does that ring any bells? For me? [00:14:39] Speaker C: It does indeed, Delilah. You know Orvus as well? A particularly troublesome tenant. He's got one of the apartments essentially in the library, rented out for his study. But he is constantly making some minor. Some major violations of his lease, and you have to continually keep coming up and serving him papers of like, stop doing that. You're not allowed to do that. [00:15:08] Speaker A: Or vous. Huh? [00:15:11] Speaker B: He reads your expression. That went with the tone. I. I see that he has not changed too much. In his face. [00:15:26] Speaker A: He is a thorn in my side, [00:15:32] Speaker B: but he is brilliant. And I am here for one of his latest creations. [00:15:40] Speaker A: I see. Well, I can take you to him on one condition. [00:15:46] Speaker B: What? [00:15:47] Speaker A: Maybe you can convince him to behave himself a little bit better than I can. Since you know him, apparently I just ask that he stop lighting things on fire. That's really. That's the big one. [00:16:01] Speaker B: That sigh that he just did, you can see, carries many, many years worth of. Oh, no. [00:16:15] Speaker A: Fires in a library. Not good. [00:16:19] Speaker B: I am aware. I am aware. Trust me, I am aware. I spent my time as well, putting out his many experiments. I will endeavor once again. Again to at least try and get him to contain it in somewhere else. [00:16:40] Speaker A: That's good enough for me. [00:16:42] Speaker D: Bal's now just thinking. Is this why he said there might be harm that comes to us? [00:16:50] Speaker B: Is he still living in the upper lodges near the library? [00:16:56] Speaker A: Yes. If he was elsewhere, he wouldn't be my problem. [00:17:02] Speaker D: What? Why is he your problem? What do you do with the blue sash? [00:17:06] Speaker A: Oh, I'm a blue warder. We take care of the library here in Tar Kasmuk. Normally it's a Dwarven organization, but occasionally they do allow others to join. I was very fortunate to make it in on my merit. [00:17:23] Speaker D: Cool. [00:17:25] Speaker A: But I am. I am, thank you. I'm on the lower ranks, so to speak. And so dealing with problems that other people don't want to deal with falls on me. And dealing with people like Orvus is one of those things that the higher ups don't want to deal with. So I'm the one that gets to do that. [00:17:47] Speaker B: He must be getting upset in years now, surely. [00:17:51] Speaker A: Yes, he is quite elderly, which makes dealing with him more delicate, because he. He wants to listen even less. And I'm beginning to suspect that he is also somewhat hard of hearing. [00:18:08] Speaker B: Then I see that much has not changed since I knew him. He was such a rambunctious youngster when he was my student. [00:18:17] Speaker A: Yeah, you see, and that brings it back to your age, which is fascinating. You don't look a day over, what, 1, 200? [00:18:28] Speaker B: It is genetics. [00:18:33] Speaker A: Clean living. I suspect [00:18:37] Speaker B: there are many mysteries in this world, and this is definitely one of them. Now, if I remember right, the lodges were that way. Yes. [00:18:48] Speaker A: Yes, you're correct. Right, this way. [00:18:50] Speaker C: I'll lead you from the teleportation circle. It is not a long journey to the lodges, although you do get to see some of the notoriously grandiose sights that we would expect from a dwarven settlement. You'll travel over Like a balcony that overlooks a 300 foot drop into a cavern space where down below there's just people milling about like ants. Torchlight just held in place by braziers with just ever burning light just brilliantly filling the cavern. One of the rooms you pass through through instead of the stone that you would expect to see, it's all just delicately carved geodes. And a single light in the center of the room is refracted throughout into a million different colors. But before long you find yourself moving up into the less grandiose portions of the library that is rented out to researchers such as Orvus. And approaching his door. [00:19:55] Speaker B: I will say through all of that Uvair Val, you'll you're the only one that could notice this. [00:20:04] Speaker D: It's true. [00:20:05] Speaker B: Uver seems a little different I suppose in only a way where somebody who this is their home, he's comfortable here. In fact through this whole thing he's actually been giving little tidbits of him history of when was this made? How is this made? Who made that? What was this atrium originally for? What has it been repurposed to like almost like a tour guide, but in much more detail than any tour guide could probably give you. Is safe for a very few unasked. He's not waiting for anybody to ask him, it's just he sees it and he says oh it's. You see this aetherium was made by the great dwarven artisan of Barak. And when he carved it etc. [00:20:57] Speaker D: Nice. [00:20:57] Speaker B: And he just goes on and he'll slow down even walking to give enough time to give that little history and then move on. [00:21:08] Speaker A: I would like to tag on to that. That Delilah, maybe not quite to the depth of knowledge that Uber has, but she will chip in with details and it's clear to Uvaire that she's done her research. She knows the city that she's living in that is not her native home. So you guys can have maybe a more detailed discussion of. Oh yeah, this Dwarven artisan, he also worked on these other buildings that you know. [00:21:38] Speaker B: Mm. [00:21:38] Speaker D: So. [00:21:39] Speaker B: And. And actually in that Uver will mention. Ah, then you read my one book. [00:21:47] Speaker A: I've read all of your books. All the ones that we have anyway. Have you worked on any more? [00:21:54] Speaker B: Several. [00:21:56] Speaker A: Well, I know I mentioned this one before, but your treatise on temporal mechanics, in that you were discussing theoretical uses for chronomancy, did you ever do any more with that? Have you ever. Did you expand. [00:22:15] Speaker D: Oh, time stuff. That's what that means. [00:22:19] Speaker B: Cue me, Sven, looking at the gm. [00:22:25] Speaker D: I didn't know you wrote about time. [00:22:27] Speaker A: Well, he did. It was all very fascinating but completely theoretical. And in the treatise he said that nothing had ever been achieved, but that all these things were possible. And I was just wondering if, since that was written so long ago, if maybe you'd worked on it some more. [00:22:43] Speaker D: I wonder you and Alward get along so well. [00:22:46] Speaker A: Alward? Another one of your friends? [00:22:51] Speaker D: Oh yeah, he's a friend of ours helping us do our thing. He's somewhere else right now though. They both talk about books and high concepts that I don't always understand. [00:23:02] Speaker A: I think I'd like this Alward. [00:23:04] Speaker D: Most people do. He's a really nice guy. [00:23:07] Speaker B: Oh my God. [00:23:11] Speaker C: Folks, we got him. [00:23:14] Speaker D: Val has been very like invested in listening to all the talk about craftsmanship and artisans, since that's a big part of what she loves. So she's also just been like super excited listening to everything [00:23:30] Speaker B: help. [00:23:32] Speaker C: So Sven Bear does not remember that book. Okay. That's why I didn't tell you about it. [00:23:40] Speaker B: I saw said that you read Treaties and Their Temporary Mechanics. [00:23:44] Speaker A: Oh yes, I've read that, but that's not what I'm. I did think the titles being that similar was odd. Was that an intentional choice? [00:23:55] Speaker B: Ver gets that troubled look. Yes, that is odd. Very odd. And he trails off for a moment as we arrive right in front of his door. [00:24:12] Speaker C: As you arrive, the door to the lodge is, as you would expect, normal. It's a stone archway with a double stone door. And what you, Delilah, did not expect, although you're not surprised to see, is a shimmering force ward over the door. Not approved by the Blue Warders by the stars. [00:24:39] Speaker A: Mr. Orvus, this shield was not approved by the warders. [00:24:46] Speaker C: As Val is. Sam is gesturing, so Val's poking up against the field and it's just. It's essentially just solid light. And as this is happening, you just hear this very faint from the side of the door and there's a crack in the stone wall as sand is pouring out. [00:25:07] Speaker A: This is. Is this worse than a usual Urvuz shenanigan? [00:25:12] Speaker C: That's kind of a par. [00:25:13] Speaker D: Pretty par. Mm. [00:25:15] Speaker A: Alright. [00:25:16] Speaker C: One piece of information that you would know. Delilah, you know what's going on with the sand? [00:25:20] Speaker A: Oh, I do. What is going on with the sand? [00:25:22] Speaker C: Orvus does not really. He doesn't really enjoy the normal material ways of having a human or a dwarf who stands guard at his door. He has a Sand Elemental that stands guard at his door. So as this sand is pouring out from the crack, it's like slowly beginning to form itself into the shape of a short, somewhat dwarf, like, humanoid. [00:25:48] Speaker A: I hate sand. [00:25:52] Speaker D: Hello? Well, hello. [00:25:56] Speaker A: Hi. [00:25:57] Speaker D: Hi. [00:25:57] Speaker A: It's me, Delilah. Remember me? [00:26:00] Speaker C: Ah, charming to see you again, Delilah. [00:26:03] Speaker A: I need to speak to your master, please. [00:26:06] Speaker C: You'll have to say the password. [00:26:08] Speaker A: It changes every five minutes every week. [00:26:11] Speaker C: Thank you. [00:26:12] Speaker A: It feels like five minutes. [00:26:14] Speaker C: Well, I can't help it that you guys don't live as long. [00:26:18] Speaker A: Casual racism? [00:26:20] Speaker D: Serendipity. [00:26:22] Speaker C: No, my name is Poreal. [00:26:25] Speaker A: I think she was guessing the password. [00:26:27] Speaker D: Porio. [00:26:28] Speaker C: Oh, no. [00:26:29] Speaker D: Hi, Poriel. [00:26:30] Speaker C: Hi. [00:26:30] Speaker D: My name's Val. [00:26:31] Speaker C: Hi. [00:26:32] Speaker B: Vile. [00:26:32] Speaker D: No. [00:26:32] Speaker A: Val. Oh, Val. [00:26:33] Speaker D: Vile. Val. No. [00:26:36] Speaker B: Vile. [00:26:36] Speaker C: Val. [00:26:37] Speaker B: No. [00:26:37] Speaker D: Just. Just the one where I don't have a last name. [00:26:39] Speaker A: Porio. Could you maybe deliver a message to Orvus? [00:26:43] Speaker C: I could give you a hint. [00:26:46] Speaker A: Give me a hint. [00:26:47] Speaker C: All right, get ready. Obsidian's rival. Still brilliant in its gleam. Prismatic fragments fracture, Fire in a shattered stream. Ash and ember. Now listen to the rest of it. Ash and ember. Frozen within its glowing core. Light reborn in secret hues. Splendid evermore. What am I. [00:27:20] Speaker A: So you're saying it's not a diamond? [00:27:21] Speaker C: It's not a diamond. [00:27:23] Speaker B: Hold on, let me pull out my fictional geology. [00:27:31] Speaker D: Was it glass? [00:27:32] Speaker A: Well, it references fire and ember. Twice. [00:27:36] Speaker D: Can I. Can I roll crafting? [00:27:39] Speaker C: So the way I would like to do it is essentially as you guys go. If you're not figuring it out, then I'll prompt things of, like, here's something your character could know and just give you clues from your character's knowledge, if that makes sense. [00:27:55] Speaker A: Mean, it seems clear to me that it's a gemstone, probably. And fire makes me think red. So I'm Ruby. [00:28:01] Speaker C: No, Ruby was last week. You're right. [00:28:05] Speaker D: Obsidian's made from lava. Right. [00:28:07] Speaker A: But it's Obsidian's rival. [00:28:09] Speaker D: Yeah, still brilliant. And it's clean. Lapis lazuli. Nah, that's not right. [00:28:16] Speaker C: Oh, no, no. But that would be really hard. [00:28:21] Speaker D: Oh, It's a rock. [00:28:22] Speaker A: Well. [00:28:23] Speaker C: Oh. Oh, you're funny. [00:28:25] Speaker D: Thanks. I try. [00:28:28] Speaker B: Well, it's not flint. [00:28:31] Speaker D: Frozen within. That's why I was thinking like glass. Because glass has frozen like fire and sand. But like reborn in secret hues. [00:28:40] Speaker A: I need help, Jordy. [00:28:42] Speaker B: Yep. [00:28:42] Speaker C: All right. So, Delilah, without any checks, you would know that all of these clues are made up by Poriel. That Orvus has tasked him with the security of the door. Riddles was his idea. But the rule that Orvus gave him was only let people in if they're going to be interesting to talk to. So the riddles is Porireal's way of trying to deduce if somebody is interesting enough. So that's your first clue. Is this would be something that po real, an Earth Elemental, would think of as a riddle idea. [00:29:16] Speaker A: I will convey that at least to aver. But Val's standing right there, so I think she would. [00:29:24] Speaker D: It's okay. She doesn't notice. [00:29:27] Speaker B: What's an Earth Elemental's favorite snack? [00:29:31] Speaker D: Dirt. [00:29:31] Speaker A: That sounds like another riddle. [00:29:34] Speaker C: I don't know. What is an Earth Elemental's favorite snack? [00:29:38] Speaker D: Is it dirt? Do you just eat dirt? [00:29:40] Speaker C: No. [00:29:42] Speaker D: Well, what do you eat? [00:29:43] Speaker C: Mostly, like, your rocks and stuff, but dirt's just kind of mushy, you know? [00:29:48] Speaker D: That's fair. [00:29:49] Speaker C: Doesn't have a good bite to it. [00:29:50] Speaker D: I can understand that. [00:29:52] Speaker C: You got any rocks? [00:29:54] Speaker D: No. [00:29:55] Speaker C: Got any grapes? [00:29:57] Speaker D: I have a lemon. [00:30:00] Speaker A: Is it lava? [00:30:01] Speaker C: No, no. Lava. Lava be interesting. [00:30:05] Speaker D: Starts with V. What about it starts with V. Oh, lava doesn't start with [00:30:09] Speaker C: V. No, it has a V. Oh, [00:30:12] Speaker D: you said starts with V. No, it's not like maybe water, is it? [00:30:16] Speaker C: Wait, no. No, it's not water. [00:30:18] Speaker D: Oh, no. You know, light refracts off of water. I think Delilah got something. [00:30:25] Speaker C: She. [00:30:26] Speaker A: She's like. It's an opal, isn't it? [00:30:30] Speaker C: Bravo. You got it. [00:30:33] Speaker D: Oh, how did you know that? [00:30:35] Speaker A: Deductive reasoning. [00:30:38] Speaker D: What? Okay, sure that you guys are smarter than me. [00:30:44] Speaker A: It makes more sense if you read it rather than hear it. [00:30:48] Speaker D: Oh, wow. Okay, I see that. [00:30:52] Speaker C: So, for the audience's benefit, since you guys probably aren't writing it down and I can't message it to you all on Discord, if you did write it down, tell me the first letter of every line. If you read it from top to bottom as an acrostic, spells out the answer. [00:31:08] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:31:09] Speaker D: Nerd. [00:31:11] Speaker A: All right. [00:31:12] Speaker C: We did. [00:31:14] Speaker A: You did. [00:31:15] Speaker C: Welcome in. And Porial will gesture towards the portal, the wall of force, which will just shimmer and then dissipate, leaving the door unguarded. Thanks. [00:31:28] Speaker B: I see much has not changed. [00:31:30] Speaker A: Not since I've been here. [00:31:33] Speaker D: Or. [00:31:33] Speaker A: Voose, you have a visitor. I. [00:31:41] Speaker C: He's been pretty quiet the last few days. [00:31:45] Speaker B: Have you. Out of my way, please. And he walks in. [00:31:50] Speaker C: I'm just standing here. [00:31:53] Speaker D: Thank you for the fun time. [00:31:56] Speaker C: My pleasure. And as Uwe walks forward and opens the door, you're all hit with this just wave of intense hot air, like you've just opened the door into an oven. [00:32:08] Speaker A: There's a fire in here. Yep. Should have known. [00:32:12] Speaker C: There are chandeliers and sconces on the wall, but they're all burning with like this fuchsia pink flame. And in the center of the room stands a dwarvish figure who is just on fire. And that is where we'll end this episode. [00:32:36] Speaker A: I knew there was a fire. [00:32:37] Speaker B: Oh, I expect he was the fire. [00:32:41] Speaker A: The dwarf was on fire. And it wasn't my fault. [00:32:43] Speaker D: We didn't start the fire. [00:32:55] Speaker C: And the hero point for today's adventure goes to Errol. [00:32:59] Speaker D: Me. Yeah. [00:33:00] Speaker A: Because I'm the only one that has room for it. [00:33:03] Speaker C: No, no. [00:33:04] Speaker A: For being. [00:33:05] Speaker B: I mean, that's true. That's very true. [00:33:07] Speaker D: We would never talk down to you about this off mic. [00:33:11] Speaker A: Yes, Never. [00:33:14] Speaker C: It never would have been reluctantly accepted. [00:33:17] Speaker D: Cool. [00:33:18] Speaker A: Well, it feels surprisingly bad, but I'm gonna take it anyway. They are useful. [00:33:25] Speaker C: I mean. [00:33:25] Speaker A: Yeah. I like this one that I got. I will save it for later. Yeah. Well, thank I. Despite being the only option. Thank you for choosing me. [00:33:34] Speaker B: You're welcome. [00:33:36] Speaker A: I'm gonna go contemplate existence until I can figure out why this dwarf is on fire. This dwarf is on fire. [00:33:50] Speaker C: And we'll see you all in the next episode. [00:33:52] Speaker D: Don't worry. Just like the rest of us, you will use that to reroll a die. Probably. [00:33:56] Speaker B: Yep. [00:33:58] Speaker C: This has been an Atomic Broadcasting production. If you enjoyed the show, make sure to give us some support by liking, commenting and following. These things really do make a difference in getting the word out and helping our community grow. Also, make sure to check us out on threads and check out the Discord server where you can chat with other fans and discuss all the recent developments and happenings. Links to all these good things in the description below. The Written and the Lost is an original story that uses trademarks and or copyrights owned by Paizo Inc. Used under Paizo's fan Content Policy. Atomic Broadcasting and the Written and the Lost are not published, endorsed or specifically approved by Paizo. For more information about Paizo Inc. And paizo products, visit paizo.com hope to see you all in the next episode. Until then, have an atomic time. [00:34:50] Speaker D: What was that? [00:34:52] Speaker C: Sven is resetting his jaw. [00:34:54] Speaker A: You ruined the segue, Sven. This was my first written in the Lost Segue and you ruined it. [00:34:59] Speaker D: That's every written in the Lost Segue. [00:35:02] Speaker A: Welcome. [00:35:03] Speaker D: You've had the real experience of the written last segue with Svens like this. Every segue.